Conversations with Satan 008
I went to one of the hell's post office to buy a greeting card.

It is a special greeting card. Usually one has to buy greeting card to send it to somebody. Everything's different in hell. In hell one can send a greeting card for free, but a receiver must pay in order to have it. Actually such greeting card is not addressed to anybody and is not sent by anybody, since there are no personalities in hell - only desires. Usually nobody sends greeting cards in hell, that's why it is for free. Satan, as the perfect being, is the only one, who is capable to it.

Hells' greeting card is magical. You must rub it to receive a greeting. Think of something of your desire, while you rub, this will let him look into your heart and evaluate it. It should be full of flowers, that are the good deeds. If Satan likes them, he will express his gratitude and grant you his best wishes. He will take the flowers in return however. Usually they are taken by angels, put in baskets and brought to the Creator of the Universe, but there is nothing in return except for good health and lot's of children. Some people find life possible without these heavenly gifts, since there is television, alcohol, medicine and opportunities to travel far, far away.

I bought eleven greeting cards. Only one of them contained a very, very small greeting... Looks like I didn't really rub them good enough. Or is my heart empty? I don't remember angels visiting me. Well, I have always been bad at collecting flowers. Even worse at gardening.