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[Oct. 4th, 2021|12:45 am] |
Nesen noskatījos interviju ar Velbeku - kaut kāda runa par literatūru kā escape. Jūtu atkal depresiju nākam virsū spēcīgi. Vai bija neizbēgami - nezinu. Tā nu cenšos rast atkal mierinājumu filmās, literatūrā, vārdos un attēlos ilgi to nebiju darījis - pietika ar sauli, skriešanu, peldēšanos un tamlīdzīgām lietām.
Beketam ir stāsts The Calmative, kuru reiz savā naivumā mēģināju tulkot. Man likās, ka šī stāsta galvenā doma bija tieši šāda - stāsti nomierina. Interesanti, ka daudziem vecāki lasīja priekšā stāstus/ pasakas bērnībā pirms gulētiešanas. Šaubos ka ar mani kas tāds notika. Bet kāpēc tomēr šī tieksme dzīties pēc mierinājuma fikcijā? Iespējams, ka tas patiešām varētu būt kaut kas jungfreidiski zemapzinīgs/ kopīgs visiem. Lai gan hvz.
Un lūgtum, mīlasstāsts:
They love each other, marry, in order to love each other better, more conveniently, he goes off to the wars, he dies at the wars, she weeps, with emotion, at having loved him, at having lost him, yep, marries again, in order to love again..., more conveniently again, they love each other, you love as many times as necessary, as necessary in order to be happy, he comes back, the other comes back, from the wars, he didn't die at the wars after all, she goes to the station, to meet him, he dies in the train, of emotion, at the thought of seeing her again, having her again, she weeps, weeps again, with emotion again, at having lost him again, yep, goes back to the house, he's dead, the other is dead, the mother-in-law takes him down, he hanged himself, with emotion, at the thought of losing her, she weeps, weeps louder, at having loved him, at having lost him, there's a story for you, that was to teach me the nature of emotion, that's called emotion, what emotion can do, given favourable conditions, what love can do, well well, so that's emotion, that's love, and trains, and the nature of trains, and the meaning of...” |
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