booom
"Here's the thing about my ass: I am very fond of it. When butts started to overshadow breasts as the female body part that was socially acceptable to tirelessly flaunt, I rejoiced. Here was a social trend I could genuinely participate in. Unlike my boobs, my butt can fill several handfuls, and holds a similar consistency to those Serta mattresses onto which you can leave your handprint."