#15/2 Writer’s notes
Writing as an analysis feels a lefel higher than writing as observation. Writing in a way that you observe to guide or inspire analysis might be the next level. However that might be, as a non-native speaker, I found that analytical and reflective language requires a reflective and analytical language which often escaped me. Faced with the challenge to express things in the precise nuance they’re experienced in and looking for the words for it, I found that I’ve lost not only the “next level” vocabulary in English but in Latvian too. Why didn’t you write all the words from Jenn’s book down then, I caught myself berating myself internally. I knew the echoes of memories of those words I now needed could be found there and that I’d have to look it up to express myself in the multidimensionality I felt.

Note #2 - a chapter in the O essay about relationship obsession and its environmental roots.

Finding it hard to write while not having been “cured” from the ailment much like in J.Ashworth’s “Notes Made While Falling”, I felt like I finally understood why the author had consulted so many sources to make sense, or make meaning of the condition. That might be the only way to gain foresight or perhaps any clearer sight at all. Horatio Clare’s “Heavy Light” was instrumental in seeing how to solve this problem as well. I decided to write down what I know and research what I needed to understand. This was liberating.