‘I thought that as long as I was with him, as long as I could keep him, earn him, be worthy of him – trick him into feeling something for me! – nothing else mattered. I compromised myself and my ideals in order to be with him. Over and over again I tried to be someone I wasn’t, just to keep up with him. And then he left me. And it seemed so wrong, because I had given everything, and he … It meant nothing to him. My soul was worthless to him, but important to me, and yet I had given it away so easily, and ultimately all for nothing …’

***

‘It was an odd moment for Bernadette, who was conscious of some change in herself. It was, unfortunately, not the provenance of some higher sensibility, a transformation towards a more stoic way of being, but something far more commonplace. Thoughts of Radley came unbidden at every moment: the feel of his mouth on hers, the luxury of his gentle arms encircling her body. She was not dreaming only of sensation, because now her emotions were more than they had been. She was no longer lecherous, but left more than anything desiring his good opinion. Suddenly she wanted his beliefs as her own, his good sense to guide her; she craved his respect, and wanted to be worthy of his friendship.’