Life long story

6/7/17 10:57 pm

Shhh..It will be ok, it is ok. Shhh..
I allow myself freedom of thinking way too much. To run quietly in the background and creep up when I don't pay attention to now, to rush out in silly motion or sentence for others to notice and point out. I know, I know. This has broken me. I know. Shhh.. I see now. I know what to do. From now. 

P.S. I love you. 

5/29/17 09:24 pm

Stay out of my plate! Oh, you eat only salad. Are you on diet? Oh no, look at all of those carbs and you lift? Fuck off and eat your food, stop eating me. Oh no, chocolate so early in the morning? Shut the fuck up! It is 90% cocoa. 

5/19/17 11:22 pm

Music: Bouncy music from Spotify charts
TV series: Prison Break; Lucifer; Blindspot
Food: 90% Black chocolate; Rice cakes with peanut butter 
Drink: Black coffee
Favorite human: Andy Puddicombe
Thought: Now. Everything will come to me
Product: Gym subscription; Headspace 
Project: London box
Move: Plank; Horizontal leg press
Quote: “Emptiness is the fasting of the mind.”

5/13/17 12:51 pm

“Aging is not programmed — it is the result of the failure of a renewal program.”

I mean I am blessed, but also sick of hearing - oh, you are 27? You look younger. How are we supposed to look when we are 27? Or 30, or 40 and older? I am planning to be healthy and happy as long as I can and age is just a number of years I've traveled around the Sun. Will continue work on my renewal program and mind.

5/11/17 12:36 am

Just be happy. Do whatever makes you happy.  Be with whoever makes you happy. 

Learning how to melt away all negativity and pain away with my inner sunshine. It still hurts sometimes, but somehow I feel like I've taught myself to let go of my feelings. Or maybe I trick myself all the time that nothing is there, that nothing has ever been there. I am not sure, but I don't want to really understand that right now. 

Dear Universe! Do as you please with me. I have my faith in you. You know what's meant to be for me. 

4/30/17 03:41 pm

Now. Happiness is to play silly computer games with brother. Happiness is to see plants growing. Happiness is to drink peaceful coffee cup. Happiness is to let go. Happiness is to take care of your body. Happiness is to have something to look forward to. Happiness is to be busy. Happiness is not to think about past, future or your realities. 


4/28/17 12:24 am

I have spotted young Leonardo DiCaprio and Xena the warrior princess at my gym. And damn those guns, Leo! Ripped.

4/25/17 07:00 pm

I need more energy. Coffee is not helping with this intense training. Will consider BCAA's and L-carnitine again.

Beast mode on!

4/23/17 03:13 pm

Being busy has taught me something. With too much time on our hands we tend to live in past and future imaginary worlds that are exaggerated, re-imagined and partially made up of our feelings. We drown ourselves in endless feed of information, images and nonexistent realities just to distract ourselves from now.

I am here now. I concentrate on now. No more bullshit. No more pain from yesterday. No more whys. You are not here now and you don't exist in my presence now and therefore I will not use my energy on you. I am not hurting now. I will not distract myself with useless crap and emotion.

4/19/17 10:21 pm

“To handle yourself, use your head; to handle others, use your heart.”

4/17/17 01:48 pm

I will always be here. 

“Do I still Love you? Absolutely. There is not a doubt in my mind. Through all my mind, my ego... I was always faithful in my Love for you. That I made you doubt it, that is the great mistake of a Life full of mistakes. The truth doesn't set us free, Robin. I can tell you I Love you as many times as you can stand to hear it and all that does, the only thing, is remind us... that Love is not enough. Not even close.”

4/15/17 01:36 pm

But she said, where'd you wanna go?
How much you wanna risk?
I'm not looking for somebody
With some superhuman gifts
Some superhero
Some fairytale bliss
Just something I can turn to
Somebody I can kiss

4/15/17 01:25 am

Saw original Ghost in the Shell movie from 1995. I prefer what they changed in the new movie. Makes more sense story-wise. Specially Major's back story.

4/14/17 04:53 pm

I love her character so much!

Schools in Latvia should have programs for gardening. Teach kids about what pollution and trash does to the soil and our ecosystem. In depth. 

4/14/17 12:41 am

Music: Ghost in the Shell Soundtrack; Celldweller
TV series: The Expanse; Prison Break
Food: Pasta with vegetables 
Drink: Black coffee
Favorite human: Lelde
Thought: Scary choices are in order. 
Product: Headspace
Project: Garden
Move: Horizontal leg press; incline walking
Quote: “All things change in a dynamic environment. Your effort to remain what you are is what limits you.” 

4/12/17 08:18 pm

Body still weak, but cardio is getting very easy. Love that feeling of tiredness in the morning.

4/9/17 01:40 am

If you go see Ghost in the Shell and expect typical Hollywood movie, you will walk out like - meh! But if you consider her origins you might actually understand and enjoy. Visuals are eye candy and Scarlett is perfection. 

4/8/17 12:25 pm

I'm going to go to Malaga for 2 weeks! Fuck yeah!

4/1/17 10:49 pm

Just signed up to my gym. So ready to transform my body once more!

3/25/17 09:58 pm

Ok, things are under control again. Felt hopeless for a minute. 

Got all the necessary things for running. Ran one time on my own and one time with brother. It is such a freedom to run. Will keep this up. 
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