dirty jokes
How to give a great handjob. Step 1: Use your mouth.

I like my women how I like watching Arsenal playing football.

Repeatedly beaten in their own back yard.


Why did the man break up with his Chinese girlfriend?

There was sum ting wong.

New anti-depressant for lesbians....

Trycoxagain.


I like my hookers like I like my condoms.

Punctured.


Me and my dog did it wifey style last night.

So, you didn't do it at all then


I like my women how I like my shoes.
Tied up tight, tongue sticking out and no shit in the wedge.


Relationships are a lot like fat people.

They usually don't work out.


What's red and orange and looks good on hippies?

Fire.


Name a famous Jewish butcher?

Hitler

What did Hugh Hefner shout out during sex?

"Who's your granddaddy?"

I Like my women like I like my coffee.. .down my shirt and all over my lap


If you're born in September, it's pretty safe to assume that your parents started their new year with a bang.


I asked my girlfriend if I could fuck her doggy style tonight.

"Yes, whatever takes your fancy," she replied.

So I painted my dick red, humped her leg, then shit in her shoe.