| |
[Oct. 21st, 2008|07:38 am] |
Поскольку американская медицина не смогла справиться с ожирением нации, на помощь пришла американская экономика.
Если давать официанту на чай, то надо давать и таксисту на трамвай, сантехнику на прокладки и проститутке на вибратор.
В детстве я мечтал быть бессмертным, останавливать время и уметь телепортироваться. Сейчас я хочу повышение, отпуск, новую любовницу.
Что со мной сделала эта е%аная жизнь...
После свадьбы жених признается невесте:
- Прости, но я плачу алименты двум детям.
- Ничего страшного, это не подорвет наш бюджет: я как раз на двоих детей получаю.
( ... tālāk ... ) |
|
|
| |
[Oct. 21st, 2008|07:46 am] |
I've never even met Carly Simon, but I'm so vain, I *do* think that song is about me.
Bill Muse
The Top Ways Our Lives Would Be Different Without Numbers
- Mafia forced to raise money with alphabet rackets.
- Easier to argue your way out of speeding tickets by pointing out that a radar gun reading of "really zipping along" won't hold up in court.( ... tālāk ... )
The Top Signs It's Going to Be a Bad Halloween
- Old Man Larson has escaped from the sanitarium and you're the only virgin at the Halloween dance.
- Everyone in San Francisco is wearing the French Maid costume, except the women.( ... tālāk ... ) |
|
|
| |
[Oct. 21st, 2008|10:33 am] |
The Top Things Overheard at Barack Obama's Website Design Team Meeting
- "Um, doesn't this look just like Howard Dean's design from the last election?"
- "Can you make him just a little whiter?"
- "Let's make the first letter of each paragraph spell out 'MCCAIN SUCKS'."
- "We're gonna have to go with side-to-side scrolling because of his ears."
- "Don't forget to password-protect the secret Muslim pages."
- "And how exactly do you propose we add more 'hope' to the home page?"
- "How does that picture of Hillary keep getting on the site?"
- "Sorry, Senator, once the design has been finalized we can't make any changes."
No TopFive.com |
|
|
| |
[Oct. 21st, 2008|04:26 pm] |
|
Par to pašu musulmaņu un jaunavu tēmu... ;) ( ... tālāk ... ) |
|
|