Sadaļā labākais no ne tik labajiem: Crooked Man ir gandrīz vai vienīgais, kas "pilnīgi un galīgi" patīk no Those Poor Bastards.

I am a crooked man bent down by sin

Flood water's rising fast (oh lord!)
Dead bodys floatin past (?)
Tornados swoopin down (right down!)
Out of Satan's jewel crown (oh lord!)
I had a date tonight (yessir!)
With a gal from out of state (oh lord...dunno if all these are 'oh lord')
Her daddy was a police man (that's right!)
Had himself a police badge (oh boy!)
He said I'm DOOMed to fail (why's that?!)
Said his daughter's better off in jail
I am a crooked man bent down by sin

My uncle was a christian man (oh lord!)
But the lord didn't give a damn (no voice!)
He lived sick and homeless (so poor!)
When he died, I didn't even notice (no sir!)
Me, I only got one belief (what's that?!)
Everything's worse than it seems (oh lord!)
I'm a DOOMsday preacher boy (you are?!)
Get your bucket its time to cry
I am a crooked man bent down by sin

To other folks I cannot relate
I could try, but I ain't
People just want fancy cars
Fancy house, expensive clothes
FUCK THAT SHIT, it's fuckin' wrong (yeah boy!)
All I want is to live real long (how long?!)
I wanna watch my body decay (oh lord!)
My health suffer, and my hair turn grey (yeah boy!)
Then the Devil can take me away, yeah
Satan you can have your way
I am a crooked man bent down by sin