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[Aug. 30th, 2007|08:08 am] |
Today I gave the hospital permission to youthanize my grandma. I can't wait to see how much younger she looks! The Covert Comic
I've discovered something: A movie theater is the only safe place to utter the phrase, "Hey, I recognize that hooker." Jeffrey Ehrhart
I've learned not to ask my mother for advice. She really should have clarified that whole "prey/pray" thing before the shootout with the cops started. Kremben
The Top Desperate Tourism Slogans
- Come for the Squalor, Stay for the Stonings! - We Put the "Host" in "Hostage" - Come Join the Search for Our Weapons of Mass Destruction! - As Seen on the Discovery Channel's Shark Week - Genital Mutilation -- With a Smile! - So Much Fun, We Can't Even Get Your Soldiers to Leave! - Why Pay Exorbitant Spa Prices? Try Our Montezuma Weight-Loss Plan! - Cannibalism, Schmannibalism - For Your Convenience, Our Syphilitic, Toothless, Mentally Unstable Prostitutes Now Accept Visa! - Hey, Disneyland's Not the Only Place in the World With Giant Rodents - Become Nebraska's 1000th Tourist and We'll Put You on Our State Quarter! - That Smell? Why, It's Old-World Charm!! - Yes, That's Dog in the Stew, But It's *Free Range* Dog - Ethnically Cleansed for Your Protection
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