Khe-he - April 7th, 2008 [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
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April 7th, 2008

[Apr. 7th, 2008|08:03 am]
Плюя на закон, главное не попасть в мента...

Обычно мы пьем за женщин, но сегодня я хочу выпить за тот единственный мужской орган, благодаря которому появился и продолжается род человеческий...
За ребро!

- Вы не подскажете - до скольки работает Военкомат?
- До 27...

Инвестор спрашивает своего консультанта:
- Действительно все мои деньги пропали? Все до копейки пропали?
- Почему пропали?! Просто они теперь принадлежат кому-то другому.
... tālāk ... )
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[Apr. 7th, 2008|11:25 am]
The Top Signs You're the Reincarnation of Abraham Van Helsing

- Home Depot gives you a bulk order discount on mallets and wooden stakes.
- You will only eat your Count Chocula with a silver spoon.
- I'm not really sure if I'm Van Helsing reincarnated, but if that line gets me closer to Kate Beckinsale, then so be it.
- Doesn't everyone keep a super soaker filled with holy water by the door?
- Every time you stake your tomato plants, you're compelled to scream "Die, Monster, Die!"
- Every year, the same thing: another unfortunate misunderstanding, another sudden move to a new town, another ruined Halloween for some poor kid with plastic fangs.
- You know exactly what size crucifix fits your glove compartment.
- Long story short: You noticed your blind date had an overbite. Now you're in jail and she's in therapy.

No TopFive.com
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[Apr. 7th, 2008|03:11 pm]
Inside of a ring or out, ain't nothing wrong with going down. It's staying down that's wrong.
Muhammad Ali

- Where do you find a dog with no legs?
- Where you left it.
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