| Rules Of The Air |
[Apr. 3rd, 2006|08:17 pm] |
1. Takeoffs are optional. Landing is mandatory.
2. If you push the stick forward, the houses get bigger. If you pull stick back, they get smaller. That is unless you keep pulling the stick all the way back, then they get bigger again.
3. Flying isn't dangerous. Crashing is dangerous.
4. It's always better to be down here wishing you were up there than up there wishing you were down here.
5. The ONLY time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire.
6. The propeller is just a big fan in front of the plane used to keep the pilot cool. When it stops, you can actually watch the pilot start sweating.
7. When in doubt, hold on to your altitude. No one has ever collided with the sky.
8. A 'good' landing is one from which you can walk away. A 'great' landing is one after which they can use the plane again.
9. Learn from the mistakes of others. You won't live long enough to make all of them yourself.
10. The probability of survival is inversely proportional to the angle of arrival. Large angle of arrival, small probability of survival and vice versa.
11. Stay out of clouds. The silver lining everyone keeps talking about might be another airplane going in the opposite direction. Reliable sources also report that mountains have been known to hide out in clouds.
12. You start with a bag full of luck and an empty bag of experience. The trick is to fill the bag of experience before you empty the bag of luck.
13. Helicopters can't fly; they're just so ugly the earth repels them.
14. In the ongoing battle between objects made of aluminum going hundreds of miles per hour and the ground going zero miles per hour, the ground has yet to lose.
15. Good judgment comes from experience. Unfortunately, experience usually comes from bad judgment.
16. It's always a good idea to keep the pointy end going forward.
17. The three most useless things to a pilot are: altitude above you, runway behind you, and a tenth of a second ago.
From the June, 2000 issue of Australian Aviation Magazine |
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