February 5th, 2009


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09:19 pm - 5
Alice in Wonderland. Chapter 5.


Seeing the right kind of wrong was my advantage from the birth. No one ever had to tell me those things, like I was born with some kind of strange knowledge of the world i'd have to live in. It was like I came into life with a manual for it, yeah. Since I met her - all my unique knowledge didn't apply. It was all wrong and right at the same time, never one. We had the strangest kinds of conversations, some of them seemed to not make any sense at all, laying across a flat meadow somewhere in the middle of somwhere which appeared to be a forest. I had long lost my trace of time and location. Those might have been just seconds after I met her. That might have been a life-time. We both burned my life-manual and spread the ashes over an unseen ocean. There was nothing more bewildering than being completely blank about the truths of time. And we promised to ourselves that we would see the world differently from now on. I smiled as the red ribbon in my hair danced in the breeze of my new world.


There's no place like home...this my first thought as soon as I first saw Farewell, my dream town. And maybe, in fact, it really was just a dream, I can never be too sure, no matter what I say. But there it was, as real as nothing in my life had been. You're thinking right now that I found my peace, my lost brother and a couple of freaking shiny elves and lived happily ever after. I strongly advise you to snap out of it. That kind of stuff never happens. Not even in fairy-tales as they are. My brother is in a goddamn mental asylum. And I never found him, let go of that thought.
The town was no fairytale, in fact, it was burning. It was screaming in dreadful agony. It was anyone's worst nightmare-come-true. And I absolutely loved it the first minute I felt it close. Alice rushed ahead of me to show the right way. It was really easy to get as lost as possible.
The place was completely real, still the sign saying "Farewell" was seemingly floating above ground, mocking even a thought of gravity, surrounded by a thick cloud of mist. Those coulds were positioned all over the place as they pleased. Huge, granite houses and wood houses and all possible kinds of houses were thrown around chaotically, leaving no chance to find a corelation between them. Towns were usually organized. This one was organized differently. A normal person would say it's crazy. And I could see some sense in that. The unknown woods we just came out of were higher above sea level than the small town. I could see a stone wall at the other end of it from my heights. Farewell, my dear, there's no way out. You can't go through. This is your last stop. I saw much more than what I could describe and still all the place seemed completely normal. And perfectly still.
None of what I saw gave me this new confidence I'd never experienced before, this feeling of relief. I felt calm and content, I felt peace filling my lungs. "There's no such thing as happiness," I tought to myself, "this is all I need." It was this impossible aura of the place, the atmosphere. The town was alive and it was greeting me.

(komentēt)

Mental Asphyxia - 5

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