Told you so! :)

[Helen tells James her boyfriend is cheating]
James: Well, if it makes you feel any better... do you see that bloke over there?
[Points to his friend at the end of the bar]
James: Not only does he own a personalized matching set of crocodile-skin luggage, but his favorite TV program is Baywatch. So you see there's always someone sadder than you.

James: Haircut suits you, by the way.
[Helen demurs]
James: No, it does, it does! No gag. 'Never make a joke about a woman's hair, clothes or menstrual cycles' - page one.

[to Helen who is drinking a milk shake]
James: Come on! If you don't drink your fatty drinks, you'll never really achieve quality cellulite.