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[Feb. 24th, 2010|07:57 am]
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My wife laughed when I put a stripper pole in our bedroom. She stopped laughing, though, when the strippers started showing up.

If someone is having a heart attack and you don't know CPR, try using CCR instead. It won't save anybody, but they have some great songs and it might cheer everyone up.

It isn't that I hate having to hear about how hard it was for my grandparents "back in the old country," it's that I hate having to hear about their sex life in general.


The Top Ways the Internet Is Helping Cut Health Care Costs

- Nerd boom reduces pregnancy and childbirth costs to near zero.
- Using Wikipedia to diagnose the cause of your own symptoms saves trips to the doctor and all that expensive emergency care prior to your sudden death.
- Physical therapist replaced by a Wii Fit balance board and a webcam.
- www.howtoremoveyourappendix.com
- Doctor's prescription for chemotherapy: "Sit between four and six inches in front of your monitor for several hours a day."
- Endless reading of mindless blogs eliminates the need for more expensive lobotomy.
- eBay streamlines the organ donor matching process.
- It's been trying to help you for the past ten years! Check your spam filter.

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