| |
[Mar. 5th, 2009|01:46 pm] |
An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen.
The two gentlemen were talking, and one said, 'Last night we went out to a new restaurant and it was really great. I would recommend it very highly.'
The other man said, 'What is the name of the restaurant?'
The first man thought and thought and finally said, 'What is the name of that flower you give to someone you love?
You know... The one that's red and has thorns.'
'Do you mean a rose?'
'Yes, that's the one,' replied the man. He then turned towards the kitchen and yelled, 'Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to last night?'
A husband and wife were sitting watching a TV program about psychology when he turned to his wife and said, "Honey, I bet you can't tell me something that will make me happy and sad at the same time."
She said, "Why, you have the biggest penis out of all your friends!"
A man walks into a bar with a duck and a biscuit tin. He sets the duck on top of the biscuit tin on the bar and the duck begins dancing. The barman finds this rather interesting as do the rest of the punters in the pub. They all come round the duck and watch it for ages, and while doing so, buy more and more drink.
By the end of the night the bar is full of people watching this amazing duck, still dancing and giving the odd quack now and again. The barman realises that he hasn't had business this good in a long time. It is so good that he offers to buy the duck from the man to which the man agrees to sell for £500. The barman thinks it is a bit expensive but agrees to buy it anyhow. On selling the duck, the man goes home leaving a crowded pub watching his dancing duck.
Later that night, the man gets a telephone call; it is the barman and he exclaims that the duck is a great success and that he has his money back in the amount of drink he has sold, but he says - "There is one thing... How do you get the duck to stop dancing?"
to which the man replies........
......."Oooh simple! - just take the lid off the biscuit box and blow out the candle!" |
|
|
