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Sep. 30th, 2008|02:09 pm |
They say if you have positive thoughts about something, t will happen. Well, I've been thinking positively about my neighbor's 19-year-old daughter, but so far, no luck. I think maybe my wife's negative thoughts are interfering. Maurizio Mariotti
The Top Signs You're a Character in a Video Game
- Your solution to the health care problem: Guzzle every bottle you can find. - You never have to buy anything. You just pick up stuff you find lying around. - You carry around every weapon you own, from a knife to a napalm-firing bazooka, with ammo for each. - Constantly telling kids about the olden days of eight bits, when you had black dots for eyes and were thankful for that. - You drive like a maniac, breaking traffic laws and running people over left and right, and never seem to get in much trouble about it -- but you aren't Halle Berry or Nick Nolte. - Every day it's the same routine: Wake up, kill between 20 and 500 aliens, eventually get shot, start the day over. - You get knocked out by a +2 Pretzel of Choking, yet still manage to defeat the Evil Dictator. - Your tombstone reads, "Try Again? Y/N"
The Top Slogans for Legalized Marijuana
- Got Buzz? - Pot: When You Care Enough Not to Care At All - A Day Without Pot is Like School - Weed My Lips! - Hey, America -- Let's Blow This joint! - What's So Great About Short-Term Memory Anyway? - Obey Your Jones - Hemp: The world's practical solution to making, like, paper and rope and necklaces and stuff - It's Not Just For Glaucoma Anymore! - Help Eradicate Road Rage in Our Lifetime - Official Sponsor of the NBA - Because the waste is a terrible thing to mi... Dude! I totally f***ed that up!
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