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[May. 19th, 2008|02:43 pm]
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The Top Advantages to Living In a Haunted House

- Whatever lives under the porch loves Girls Scouts and you love Girl Scout Cookies: win-win!
- Wife falls in the toilet because the seat was left up? Yeah, it was those darn *ghosts* again!
- Levitation sleep is good for the back.
- With all the corpses in the swimming pool, you can act out scenes from Titanic whenever you like!
- Constant shrieks of terror drown out your idiot neighbor's car stereo.
- Who doesn't enjoy soothing theramin music in the background?
- You don't need a security system as long as the ottoman thinks burglars are tasty.
- The caskets in the cellar make last minute sleepovers possible.
- No need to worry about buying bran or laxatives, what with always having the crap scared out of you.

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