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[Sep. 22nd, 2010|03:41 pm] |
No @5tevenw twiterī:
Never hold your farts in. They travel up your spine, into your brain, and that's where you get shitty ideas from
BREAKING NEWS - Announcing merger of MySpace, Facebook, YouTube and Twitter, it is to be called MY FACE YOU TWIT.
Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
I danced like no one was watching. Court date is pending...
Wife was watching cooking show, I said ''Why are you watching that! You don't know how to cook?''. She said ''Well you watch porn!''
I stayed up all night playing poker with tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died.
I have CDO. It's like Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, but in alphabetical order as it should be.
Difference between complete and finished? If you've a beautiful girlfriend life is complete, wife finds out, you're finished.
I'm hung like Einstein and smart as a horse.
Jesus says to John, "Come forth and I shall give you eternal life"....John came in fifth...He won a toaster.
People who hate hand gestures: I salute you. |
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