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[Apr. 21st, 2010|08:15 am]
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I'd gladly serve Gaia to celebrate Earth Day, but I'm unsure of what wine to pair with her.

As a government official, in order to protect your privacy, I'll need to know certain details about it.


A lesbian high school student in Mississippi who sued for the right to bring her girlfriend to the prom was sent to a fake prom attended by only six students, while the rest of the seniors went to a secret prom held elsewhere.
Verrrrry classy, Mississippi.


The Top Signs You're Not at the Real Prom

- Two hours in and no one has puked on your shoes.
- The buffet awaits you in the next room, and you can chow down right after you take a quick moment to here about some lovely Aspen timeshares.
- Crepe paper and balloons aside, you're still dancing with the chess team inside a PODS storage unit.
- Rather than dance, students are encouraged to hold hands and pray for the strength to resist their loin-driven urges.
- The crew from "Mythbusters" is filling the room with crash-test dummies.


The Top Internet Drugs

- Wikiweedia
- Proxycontin
- Code-eine
- Spamiflu
- Lipitorrent
- Aspirintel
- iBuprofen
- Heroindows 7


The Top Songs About Cannabis

- Free Bud
- Killing Me Softly With His Bong
- Tokelahoma!
- I Just Called to Say... Uh... Umm... I Forget
- My Glaucoma


Female suicide bombers are being fitted with exploding breast implants which are almost impossible to detect, British spies have reportedly discovered.

The Top Names for a Breast Bomb

- The Mother Load
- Bosom Bazookas
- World's Fastest Breast Enlargement (4 km/s)
- Newly Implanted Permanently Placed Lethal Explosives (NIPPLEs)
- It's not an A cup or a B cup, it's a TNT cup
- Weapons of Mass Distraction
- The Wonder Bomb
- The Mammoblam
- Titty Titty Bang Bang
- Portable Weapon Rack
- Va-va-va-booms
- Who cares what they're called? If I'm gonna die, let's make it by exploding boobs.
- Milk Shake
- The Brabomba From Brazonga
- DD-Bomb
- The C4-Cup
- A Burstier

No TopFive.com
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