| Thursday, December 26th, 2013 |
| 8:09 pm |
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| 8:09 pm |
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| Wednesday, December 25th, 2013 |
| 7:44 pm |
lonely otaku says FML http://www.fmylife.com/love/21004509 Today, Christmas changed my life. Last year I had a boyfriend to cuddle with on Christmas; this year I have a body pillow of an anime character. FML |
| 7:44 pm |
peevedemployee says FML http://www.fmylife.com/work/21004456 Today, we got our Christmas bonuses. Instead of money, the company decided to give us all lunch boxes with the company name on them. I went ahead and put my lunch in mine, then put it in the break-room refrigerator. Apparently so did all the other employees. Now I can't find mine. FML |
| 7:44 pm |
WeiXinLun says FML http://www.fmylife.com/animals/21004433 Today, my new neighbors moved in. They have a chihuahua that constantly barks all throughout the day. It makes a great addition to my other neighbors that have a rooster that goes off at sunrise every morning. FML |
| 7:44 pm |
Eri_Midori says FML http://www.fmylife.com/animals/21004159 Today, my mother gave me a Christmas present for the first time in 15 years: a dog. Her 16-year-old, untrained, mean dog who wears diapers. FML |
| 7:44 pm |
holiday from hell says FML http://www.fmylife.com/miscellaneous/21004056 Today, I went to my dad's house for Christmas. Soon enough, my grandma had commented on how much weight I've gained, my aunt asked me why I'm still single, and my dad joined in by reminding me that I still haven't been accepted into college. Only three more days to go. FML |
| 7:44 pm |
JBChristian says FML http://www.fmylife.com/love/21004047 Today, I flew from South Carolina to Oregon to meet my online girlfriend for Christmas. She lied about who she was. I'm stuck here for two weeks before my return flight. FML |
| 7:44 pm |
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| 7:44 pm |
jhulich says FML http://www.fmylife.com/miscellaneous/21003791 Today, I found out that my mom isn't coming to see me for Christmas. Instead she'll be spending it in jail for a DUI and battery. Thank you to my cocklick of an aunt for taking a recovering alcoholic to a bar and pressuring her into relapse. FML |
| 7:44 pm |
Wtfbro says FML http://www.fmylife.com/love/21003775 Today, my boyfriend of five years got me a ring for Christmas. When I opened it, I was speechless and overjoyed. He then said, "It's just a ring. It doesn't mean anything." FML |
| 7:44 pm |
Anonymous says FML http://www.fmylife.com/miscellaneous/21003547 Today, I got my period, and had to rush to my parents' bathroom for some pads. They'd put all our wrapped presents in their bathroom. As I was looking, my dad thought I was opening presents and barged in, only to see me with my pants around my ankles. Now he won't stop laughing. FML |
| 7:44 pm |
PityKitty says FML http://www.fmylife.com/animals/21003528 Today, I pretended to cry in front of my cat because she doesn't cuddle with me anymore. Yeah, I tried to guilt-trip my cat into loving me. FML |
| 7:44 pm |
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| Tuesday, December 24th, 2013 |
| 7:09 pm |
GeeThanksMom says FML http://www.fmylife.com/miscellaneous/21003248 Today, my mom called to bestow upon me warm holiday pearls of wisdom: "I hope you aren't giving everyone your natural handmade eco-shit again. Gifts should be returnable. And have a price." FML |
| 7:09 pm |
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| 7:09 pm |
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| 7:09 pm |
dr immature says FML http://www.fmylife.com/work/21002747 Today, I diagnosed a patient with a spastic colon. For some reason, the term "spastic colon" has always amused me, and I burst into uncontrollable laughter as I said it. By the time I managed to stop laughing, my eyes were watering and my patient was visibly angry. FML |
| 7:09 pm |
rainastartree says FML http://www.fmylife.com/money/21002634 Today, my husband and I were fighting over money. As we were arguing, our 13 year old daughter stole $250 dollars from my purse. FML |
| 7:09 pm |
JoshuasGirl says FML http://www.fmylife.com/intimacy/21002524 Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time, after he repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me. He passed out halfway through. FML |