When we don’t have the capacity for solitude, we turn to other people in order to feel less anxious, or in order to feel alive. When this happens, we’re not able to appreciate who they are. It’s as though we’re using them as spare parts to support our fragile sense of self. We slip into thinking that always being connected is going to make us feel less alone, but we’re at risk because it’s the opposite that’s true. If we’re not able to be alone, we’re going to be more lonely.