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[Dec. 23rd, 2008|08:12 pm] |
Musicians are upset because all their songs can be found for free on the Internet now. But I'd like to point out that it takes me *hours* to download those songs, and nobody's compensating me for *my* time either. Well, actually they are because I do it at work, but you know what I mean.
Doug Vargas
My love for my woman is a lot like chewing my own toenails: delightful up to the point where I get too close.
Travis Ruetenik
The Top Toys for Bad Kids
- Squeeze 'n' Swear Cookie Mobster
- Thomas the Tanked Engineer
- Drinkin' Logs Mar-Teeny Bartender Playset
- Snakes and Ladders on a Plane board game
- Operation, Sexual-Reassignment Surgery Edition
- Horny Horny Crack-Hos
- Torture-Me Abdul-Elmo (comes with waterboard)
- Nicotine Patch Kids
- Shoot First! official NYPD board game
- Naturalamb Balloon Animal Kit
- Mutant Ninja Turds
- Mr. Pot Head
- HungBob NoPants: A Girl's First Sex Doll
- Li'l N'awlins Bathtub Playset
- Heckle-Me Kramer
The Top Christmas Carols Written by Lawyers
- God Rest Ye, Jury Foreperson
- What Verdict Is This?
- Deck the Hostile Witness
- Did You Sue Who I Sued?
- Indemnity Clause Is Coming to Town
- Hark! The Managing Partner Calls
- Do You Hear What I-- Objection! Hearsay!
- It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like a Winter Holiday, Including, But Not Limited to, Christmas, Hanukkah, Eid, Ramadan, Kwanzaa, and/or Solstice, Without Reservation or Limitation
The Top Internet Euphemisms for Having Sex
- Increasing the bandwidth and -length
- Client-Server DNA Exchange Protocol
- Logging in and out and in and out and...
- Uploading to an "I pee" address
- ~~~~> O
- Clicking the pop-up
- Compromising the honeypot
- Putting YouTube into MySpace
The Top Not-So-Worthy Engineering Projects
- World's smallest bottle of beer.
- World's largest diaper.
- World's shortest bridge.
- Unleashing the true power of cheese.
- Disease-resistant weeds.
- Web-enabled bathrobe.
- A way to fax coffee.
- Armor-piercing chicken nuggets.
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