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[Jul. 2nd, 2008|10:38 am] |
If I ever won the lottery, I would give it all to charity: "The Tom Sims Foundation for the betterment of Tom Sims."
Tom Sims
The Top Benefits of Working from Home
- Fart with impunity (although it's really no difference from the office.)
- Holding staff meetings in your pajamas gives you a weird sense of power not experienced in the office.
- No more fighting over the use of the company microwave.
- No more of those *&^#%$! "Office Safety" videos!
- No porn filter.
- When someone swipes your lunch from the fridge, you can pretty much narrow it down to one of three people.
- Only your spouse looks at you funny when you play your "Hannah Montana" CDs.
- Photocopy your ass whenever the mood siezes you!
- "I'm booked then, but I can squeeze you in after my one-hour meeting with Oprah."
- Ditch the ear buds and rock out to Public Enemy on Volume 11.
- Diminished incidence of sexual harassment complaints.
- Every day is Casual Day, Friday is now Naked Day.
The Top Fun Facts About Chinese Hip-Hop
- The Wu-Tang Clan? Actually a family of farmers from Wu-Tang Province.
- Still illegal to play anything by Boyz Tiananmen.
- When the "lead flies" in the Chinese hip-hop turf wars, it's because the artists heaving toys at each other.
- Many songs about appreciating and honoring the fine work done by Chinese police officers.
- Only one child per babymama.
- Several top stars got their big breaks on The Mickey Mao Club.
- The martial arts are paid homage to by the Chinese rap group The Chuck Norris Clan.
- Although he was acquitted of indecent behavior, not everyone believes Peking Tomm was innocent.
- Drive-by shootings are a bitch, especially when you're the one pulling the rickshaw.
- Chinese hip-hop rule #1: Never call anyone "dawg" in a restaurant.
- No clever hip-hop name needed for rapper Wan Phat Ho.
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