.es, iespējams, nedaudz mīlu vudiju allenu.

Most of the time I don't have much fun. The rest of the time I don't have any fun at all.

When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.

I'm very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.

Sex between 2 people is a beautiful thing; between 5 it's fantastic.

I want to tell you a terrific story about oral contraception. I asked this girl to sleep with me and she said 'No.

I'm such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own.

I am not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it happens.

To you I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.

Brilliant and hilarious.
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