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[Jul. 8th, 2009|12:54 pm] |
In his Sunday sermon, the pastor at my church urged us all to be more God-like. So today I dynamited a hydro dam and flooded an entire valley.
Ian Dauphinee
One cool thing about learning to read a sundial is that I no longer have to look like a geek wearing my watch at the nude beach.
Brad Simanek
The Top Work Haiku's
Job used to be fun.
Now we can not drink at work.
Damn bailout money
McDonald's sucks ass
Burger King is the greatest
Check out my whopper
Sysadmins hate you
new passwords are required
please don't use pet names
This is personal
Performance Improvement Plan!?!?!?!
Glad I banged your wife
Twenty years at job
Bright youth wasted, soul is gone
Hell sneaks up on you
Watch and learn at work
Co-workers good example
Of what not to do
Vile, soul-sucking job
But it's not completely bad
The coffee is free!
Once worked for GM
Now, unemployment pays more
Thank you, taxpayers
Hot girls in office
But I am invisible
Thanks to tech degree
Crap, network is down
Call tech support help line now
Control-Alt-Delete
MSNBC has become the liberals' choice for political news, just as FOX has always been the choice for conservatives. Both channels have obvious biases, but fans of each seem to think THEIR channel's reporting is balanced and the OTHER channel is for loonies.
But have no fear, TopFive is here to sort things out for you! Today we're looking at the righty bias...
The Top MSNBC Headlines as Re-Interpreted by FOX News
- MSNBC: George Stephanopoulos and Barney Frank Speak at Democratic Fundraiser
FOX: Dems Caught Using Midget, Homosexual in Moneymaking Scheme
- MSNBC: Gov. Sanford Admits Affair with Argentinean
FOX: Gov. Sanford Brings International Affairs Expertise to Presidential Race
- MSNBC: President Swats Fly During Interview
FOX: Obama Savagely Murders Innocent Passerby
- MSNBC: Magnitude 7.8 Earthquake Levels Hollywood
FOX: Existence of God Proven!
- MSNBC: First Lady Takes Public Bus to Area Mall
FOX: Michelle Obama Uses Taxpayer-Funded 40-Passenger Vehicle for Private Shopping Boondoggle
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