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Mar. 4th, 2008|08:11 am |
The Top Complaints of The Loch Ness Monster
- Swamp Thing won't honor the restraining order.
- 3AM phone calls from a drunken Lake Champlain monster get really old really fast.
- "'Shy, elusive creature' or not, if that redhead in the bikini water skis past me again..."
- Sonar readings totally fail to do justice to his excellent Sean Connery impression.
- "That cool shark in Jaws gets a John Williams score with full orchestra. What do I get? Drunken Angus McPherson and his bagpipe."
- Ever get downwind of a boat full of sweaty cryptozoologists?
- Tough to keep the species going when the only 2 chicks are over in Loch Mullardoch.
- That bastard Creature from the Black Lagoon gets all the chicks!
- Everyone claims to have seen Nessie, but just try and get a pizza delivered.
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