You dont want love to come through to you. You like it the way you are. To be unreachable, no need to show feelings. Hiding everything inside you. You are already used to it. You say yourself that you dont need anyone, that you stand on your own two feet or that you dont have time for these things. But in reality you are scared to get hurt. You feel save where you are: by yourself, nobody can hurt you there. You invent your own relationship in your dreams. You just need to know that you COULD get a partner. Thats it.