I grew up thinking the path you are on is the path you are on- that it was reality: you had to bloom not only where you were planted but whatever you were planted as that's all you could be. This is how some people, social groups and communities raise their kids to think. It's so ingrained in you since you were born that as you grow you have no idea that you actually have free will. You compare yourself to others, look at the chess placement they put you on and you stay there. You think that's who you are.