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Hedgehogs in the Fog [or Afterlife of the Two Ducks] Apr. 12th, 2009|12:17 am

sofia
i had a magic experience today. i even thought i might be dead or in coma at least, but [of course] i wasn't.

i was on the beach. actually it wasn't a long time since my last visit of the coast - only a week.
the difference struck me..
last week i saw the horizon, the sun, the water and people walking all around, heard laughter and felt the wind.
but today all was different. even when i was approaching the beach and i saw nothing.
i went into nowhere. i had no idea of what's in 15 m from me.
everything was bright white, so i had to squint.
it wasn't snow or fog. but it still was some kind of vapour.
it rose from the water, still killin' cold in this time of year.
it rose and floated around us. i felt very strange being in it.
there was that total, deafening silence.
i couldn't neither hear, nor see anyone else but us, though i knew there were many other "hedgehogs in the fog".
the vapour was warm. it floated soft and still.
there was some note of crystal gazing on the one hand.
on the other - i felt like already dead.
that life i had there on the beach wasn't real. it wasn't life. and it wasn't anything else.
nothing mattered, because nothing existed.
there were no thoughts, no obligations, no responsibilities, no memories, no opinions.. nothing..
no past and no future..
the strangeness of the scene was increased by the two ducks.
ducks on the beach! watching the whiteness of the non-existent horizon.
the ducks were as dead as we were. and still as alive..

afterward [on my trip home] i thought that i existed only for myself, that other people couldn't see me, that i was white and vapourised for them.. funny - how it works..


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