11:31 pm - mental activity in my case
Many people would like to relax, but they cannot."You have to understand the whole phenomenon - why you are so active, why so much occupation with activity, why you are so obsessed with it.
Remember two words: one is action, another is activity.
Action is not activity; activity is not action. Their natures are diametrically opposite. Action is when the situation demands it and you act.
Activity is when the situation doesn't matter, it is not a response; you are so restless within that the situation is just an excuse to be active.
Action comes out of a silent mind; activity comes of out a restless mind.
Action is when it has relevance; activity is irrelevant.
Action is creative; activity is destructive - it destroys you and others.
Try to see the delicate distinction. For example, you are hungry, then you eat - this is action. But you are not hungry, you dont feel any hunger at all,
and still you go on eating - this is activity. This is a kind of violence: you destroy food, you crush your teeth together and destroy food.
It gives you a little release of your inner restlessness. You are eating noy because of hunger, you are simply eating because of an inner need, an urge to be violent.
..
A man sitting and chewing gum, what is he doing? He is killing somebody. In the mind, if he becomes aware,he may have a fantasy of murdering, killing - and he is chewing gum,
a very innocent activity in itself. You are not harming anybody - but very dangerous for you, because you seem to be completely unconscious of what you are doing.
A man smoking, what is he doing?
..
through smoking he is doing a sort of chanting, a rhythmic chanting. It soothes; his inner restlessness is relieved a little.
....
But this activity shows that you are obsessed. You cannot remain yourself; you cannot remain silent, you cannot remain inactive. Through activity you go on throwing out your madness, insanity. "
-Osho