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Dec. 13th, 2009|12:18 pm |
Republicans should try looking on the bright side more often. Last year, at least eight Democrats ran for president and all but one lost badly.
The Top Pet Peeves of Santa
- Thanks to hip-hop, he's had to change the way he laughs so as to not denigrate women.
- Blitzen and his traditional Bon Voyage Burrito Lunch on Christmas Eve.
- Hard to remember which harness is for the reindeer and which is for the missus.
- Due to one little typo decades ago, he never, ever gets what he really wants: nookies and MILF.
- Global warming is killing off the reindeer population, and water buffalo and hippos haven't tested out very well.
- Ever try to get reindeer poop out of red velvet?
- Recently got distracted by his new computer-based scheduling program and flew the sled 150 miles past the North Pole.
- You know that funny email that uses physics to prove I can't fly around the world in one night? I've only seen it FIFTY BILLION TIMES!!!
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