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Oct. 17th, 2009|12:00 pm |
The best thing about Twitter's 140-character limit is that it sometimes keeps profanity-prone me from inadvertently inserting any unnecessary motherfu
Brad Simanek
I didn't know whether to be thankful or horrified upon hearing that my wife's radiologist was nominated for seven Mammogrammies, including Breast New Artist.
Sib Mandrake
The Top Undiscovered Schwarzenegger Scandals
- He once groped his own ass by mistake.
- He was a charter member of the Duran Duran Fan Club.
- When he thinks no one is listening, he drops the phony accent and actually sounds like that guy from "Dude, Where's My Car?"
- In his weight-lifting days, suffered from locker room "shy bladder."
- His Swiss bank account holds every dollar he's made from his Tupperware franchise.
- He claims a steroid-fueled rage was behind his mauling of illusionist Roy Horn.
- He can only bench-press 25 pounds with his penis.
- He always roots for Colonel Klink to foil that rascally Hogan.
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