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Jul. 5th, 2007|11:26 am |
The Top 6 Beauty Tips for Women, From Men
- Go-ahead, keep us waiting "just a few more minutes" as you get ready to go out. We'll just fantasize about someone else.
- If you have to spend two hours putting on makeup to make yourself look presentable, please convert to a religion that encourages you cover your face in public.
- Having your thong show above your jeans isn't sexy, it's kinda slutty. (And that is hot.)
- An honest smile beats implants, assuming your guy ever looks that high.
- It's not the pants. Your ass is just big.
- Of course we care how you look. Just not at the expense of the game.
The Top Features Of Britain's New Stealth Submarine
- A diving board.
- Large floor porthole for Tony Blair to see his approval ratings.
- Water-based stealth touch-up paint.
- Manchester United now plays their home games there.
- Comes standard with a spare aircraft carrier inside.
- Steve Jobs, who is testing software for the soon to be released Apple iSub.
- Kaleidoscope periscope.
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