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Jun. 26th, 2007|07:55 am |
The Top Signs a Presidential Candidate Is an Actor
- Will show up for debates only if his dressing room has a bowl of green M&Ms.
- He's got that cold gleam of sincerity in his eye.
- Before each speech, he has to have an emotional moment.
- Refers to White House as "my next project."
- Changes "Hail to the Chief" to the theme from "The Tonight Show."
- After two terms as president, suddenly wakes up next to Suzanne Pleshette and discovers it was all a dream.
- Declares she will do nudity if it is integral to the bill.
- His answer to unrest in the Middle East? "Remove it digitally in post-production."
- "As Abraham Lincoln once said, 'Four score and seven years ago... um... and seven years ago...' [*ahem*] LINE!"
- "To stop bureaucratic waste, we need more whistle blowers! You know to be a whistle blower, don't you? Just put your lips together and blow."
- When he tosses his hat into the ring, his hairpiece goes flying right along with it.
- Keeps interrupting the debate moderator to ask when he and Hillary are supposed to have their steamy love scene.
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