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Mar. 27th, 2007|10:52 am |
The Top Differences Between the Internet and the Matrix
- Newer versions of the Internet are better than previous ones.
- People in the Matrix dress much cooler than people on the Internet.
- Thanks to the F5 key, "reloading" is a lot less complicated on the Internet.
- Most people in the Matrix don't know about the real world, while most people who use the Internet...uh, never mind.
- The Matrix: hot girls in leather talk to computer geeks. The Internet: hot girls in leather talk to computer geeks for $2.99 a minute.
- The closest that the Internet has come to enslaving the human race is through World of Warcraft.
- To access the Internet we have to deal with ISP tech support, while those lucky bastards in the Matrix just need to have a sharp probe jammed into their skulls.
- In the Matrix, you take the blue pill to return to a world of blissful ignorance. On the Internet, you buy blue pills to get an erection.
The Top Signs Your Pet is a Reincarnated Lawyer
- Charges you for a full hour when looking over the papers you put down for him to do his business on.
- From the annoyingly repetitive shrieks, apparently Polly wants an "OBJECTION!"
- When he brings you your leather slippers, they don't fit!
- When you confront her about the mess in the foyer, she acts out a fairly convincing case that the goldfish did it.
- "Permission to treat the hydrant as hostile."
- Your goldfish has three rows of teeth and a cartilaginous dorsal fin.
- It's a cat.
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