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[Oct. 21st, 2007|01:21 pm] |
Студент шлет домой маме телеграмму: "Провалился на экзамене. Подготовь папу".
Через день получает ответ: "Папа подготовлен. Готовься сам!"
Знакомый из Питера приехал (в Москву), спрашивает:
- Какое от твоего дома тут метро ближайшее?
- Медведково.
- А@#еть! А Креведково у вас тут строить не собираются??
( ... tālāk ... ) |
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[Oct. 21st, 2007|06:36 pm] |
The Top Plotlines If Schwarzenegger Appears in "Terminator 4"
- The Terminator infiltrates the phone company to help track down and kill anyone who has ever said the phrase "I'll be back" in a bad Austrian accent on an answering machine message.
- California's government is paralyzed when the election results are "Total Recalled."
- Kyle Reese explains that in addition to the T-800 being an unstoppable killing machine, it also likes to usurp Democratic initiatives and claim them as his own.
- The incredibly out-of-shape killing machine gets his flabby butt stuck in the portal from the future, thus allowing Sarah Connor to slap him into submission.
- The Terminator comes back and, through a series of hilarious mix-ups, finds himself in charge of a gaggle of cute, precocious five year olds in "Terminator 4: Kindergarten Cyborg."
- Terminator 4? What happened to Terminator limits?
- The Terminator is sent back to 2008 to stop the Democrats rise to power, but is thwarted by a being even more cold, ruthless, and heartless than he: Hillary Clinton.
- The Terminator returns from the future not to kill Sarah Connor, but merely to grope her.
No TopFive.com |
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