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Sep. 8th, 2010|02:33 pm

khehe
No @5tevenw twiterī:

Why is it that joggers always are the ones who find dead bodies. I'm very wary of joggers.

I'll never forget what dad said to me just before he kicked the bucket.He said "Steven.. how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

I think my girlfriend has had sixty-one boyfriends before me. She calls me her sixty second lover.

I don't buy fat-free milk because I don't want to encourage cows with body image issues.

Little birdie in the sky,
Dropped a poopie in my eye,
I didn't scream, I didn't cry,
But I thanked the Lord cows can't fly!

ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI.

I think my neighbour just caught me stealing his wifi internet connec

Mate went to docs; premature ejaculation, Doc couldn't do much except introduce him 2 a woman with a short attention span

There's a first time for everything.......Except deja vu.

Priest prays for safe rescue of miners. The rest of the world prays for safe rescue of minors from the priest.

I tried to say no to the vodka but it was 40% stronger than me

I got a Rolex for my birthday from the lesbians next door. I think they misunderstood me when I said I wanna watch.
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