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Šis tas, no vecajiem arhīviem, par Eiropas Savienības valodu.
The European Union commissioners have announced that
agreement has finally been reached to adopt English as the
preferred language for European communications, rather than
German, which was the other possibility. As part of the final negotiations however, Her Majesty's
Government conceded that English spelling had some room for
improvement and has accepted a five-year phased plan for
what will be known as Euro English (Euroeng for short). In the first year, "s" will be used instead of the soft "c".
Sertainly, sivil servants will resieve this news with
joy. Also, the hard "c" will be replaced with "k". Not only
will this klear up konfusion, but typewriters kan have one
less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year,
when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced by "f". This will
make words like "fotograf" 20 per sent shorter. In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan
be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated
changes are possible. Governments will enkorage the removal
of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to
akurate speling. Also, al will agree that the horible mes of
silent "e"s in the languaj is disgrasful, and they would go. By the forth yer, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as
replasing "th" by "z" and "w" by v. During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords
kontaining "ou", and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to
ozer kombinations of leters. After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl.
Zer vil be no mor trubls or difikultis and evrivun vil find
it ezi tu understand ech ozer.
Ze drem vil finali kum tru.
Auf wiedersehen.
(Authorship unknown.)
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