ad_nauseam's Journal

10:11pm: skabakais ir tas, ka iedzerot man tiesham paliek labak. nervi aizmirstas - degosha mugura, lauzitas rokas, etc. etc. doks nelauj, bet es vienalga ierauju, jo anestezee tachu.
bet nu pa lielam man ir vienalga. vai ari - es DOMAJU, ka man ir. jo, ka zinams, prieksstati ir viena lieta, bet realitate medz but cita. un realitati jau parbauda tikai prakse, kad ir konkreta situacija, kuraa jarikojas te un tagad. un tikai tad ari izkristalizejas, ko PATIESIBA juti un cik verts ir tas "a man vienalga".
bet nu jaa, draivs ir pazudis. esmu sapratusi, ka ar mani negulesi. yeah, right, whatever. another nail in my coffin. it was short-lived, man, but then again - i never had any hopes (apart from having a passionate, loving relationship that would last and maybe, yes, even family) so why should i be disappointed? but i am, man. i am.

10:27pm: un tomer - man tik loti patik tavas rokas. tu man pieskaries, iztausti plecus etc. - un es vienkarsi kuustu. un man liekas - that's what i need, that's exactly what i need, darling. jus touch me a little more, a little closer to the skin - and i will be healed. i promise. es skatos un redzu, ka ari tev tie nagi mazliet apgrauzti, toties pirksti tik specigi un viriskigi, un rokas spalvainas :) un tad es aizeju majas un sacelu oj kadas sapnu pilis in terms of where your big hairy hands might go and what they might do to me. jesus. grow up, woman, yeah? nope. i like it like this. es gribu nogulties tev apaksa un atdoties.

10:33pm: i know i have said it before but just for a DEFINITE record - nevienu neesmu gribejusi tik loti ka tevi. mulkis tu esi, jo tu to pat neapjedz.
i want to sleep with you.
i want to kiss you.
i want to lick you, and suck you and do things with you.