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[21 Dec 2003|05:07pm] Vai tu esi dzirdeejis kaut ko par meiteni, kura nekad nekljuudiijaas? Nee? Te vinja staav _ tavu acu priekshaa Dzidraam aciim un smiekliem uz luupaam Meitene, kura nekad nekljuudiijaas Kuras vieniigaa kljuuda Biji tu... post comment

":) [11 Dec 2003|03:39pm] aj,,atnacu tik iechekot sjo to post comment

nakc... [04 Dec 2003|10:57pm] =) rit pretika diena :D exis vaceneee..akal me wisu uz nahaljavu :P post comment

.... [01 Dec 2003|10:05pm] Love When I am with you I get this feeling, the feeling of love. When I am in your arms looking into your eyes, I know you will always be mine. When you touch my face and kiss me, it's the most wonderful feeling and the sweetest taste. When I am with you I realize how much I love you, and sometimes you make me so happy I cry. I never found a love so true, because all the other guys left me and made my heart all black and blue. Before I met you I thought I would never love again, but you changed everything and I know our love will never come to an end. You are my everything and no one can ever compare to you, and that's why I am deeply, deeply in love and I know you are too. *** post comment

.... [01 Dec 2003|10:05pm] A Definition Of Love To love is to dedicate and commit, and truly care with all your heart... To unconditionally give and receive, and share feelings, emotions and concerns. To love is to understand a lover's worries and respect any unpopular points of view... To whisper words of truth and peace and commune with silent voices within. To love is to share deep-rooted secrets and help fulfill desires of the heart... To communicate every vision conceived and strive to accomplish all known dreams. To love is to cheerfully enjoy in good times and be bold to stay in bad times... To bear together private pains and gains and share public shame and pleasures. To love is to celebrate victories won and forget losses that hurt feelings... To defend and protect at all times and help drive away hidden fears. To love is to mutually resolve differences and complement every strength and weakness... To forgive all sins and trespasses and forget known faults and failures. To love is to be truthful and honest and not harbor any hidden agenda... To be selfless and generous in all regards and believe and trust with all the heart. post comment

.... [01 Dec 2003|10:05pm] Heartbreaker I see you with so many girls, How do they fall for you? I guess you're a heartbreaker? I see girls cry over you. You must be too good to be true? I guess you're a heartbreaker? I see girls tryin to give you the world, Me,wanting to know why? I guess you're a heartbreaker? Why are all these girls with you, cryin over you, tryin to give you the world, When you only give them your smile? post comment

.... [01 Dec 2003|10:05pm] My Angel What can I say, Every time I see your beautiful bright smile, I don't know what to say, Every time I look into your beautiful brown eyes, I can't look away. I would do anything for you, I would die on this day, I love you more and more, Each and every day, Your tears, Like a leaf on a beach, I would wash away. Your smile, Like sun after rain, Would appear in my way, All these emotions I have inside of me, I don't know how to say, So I'm asking you today, Will you go out with me and make my day? post comment

.... [01 Dec 2003|10:05pm] Simplicity Simple heart, simple love. O' sweet simplicity is your fame. That you would descend from above. An angel within your name. Simple words, simple touch. O' and you are so very well. That I would hold you and cherish much, too much to even tell. Simple thoughts, simple tears. And O' you comfort me so. Sooth the pain of my own fears, more than you'll ever know. Loving simplicity is all I need, and O' I adore you more. When all I want is an end, to bleed, You're all worth living is for. post comment

.... [01 Dec 2003|10:05pm] Friendship Never Ends You are my day, You are my night. I shall never stray, From you; my light. You make me smile, For you can be Humorous, once in a while, Making me happy. I don't know, What you want from me? How far do I have to go, To make you see? Though you're not mine, And we're just friends, This is fine, For, friendship never ends... post comment

.... [01 Dec 2003|10:05pm] My Love For You My Love for you only grows stronger with each new day, The feelings so intense at times they even "blow" me away. It's continually nurtured - like a plant, With concern, caring, giving of myself. To be without you is like a 'part' is missing, I'm not whole unless I'm with you. You bring out sides of me, that I've had to push down But, with you, I'm free to be me - as you are. It's wonderful to let all these sides out finally, Romancing is soooooo wonderful with you. I hear & see things differently now, Like words in a song - they take on new meaning. It's like everything I hear & see pertains to us, My eyes are fully opened & every fiber in me has been awakened. You.. my Dear, do this to me , And it's wonderful, wild and sweet. A bird's song is melodious - whereas before... just chirping, The quietness of a starry nite is now so beautiful, When shared with someone you Love. My heart is overwhelmed and consmed by this, OUR Love is so intense. Come hold my hand once again - and tenderly kiss it, You stroke my hair with admiration in those eyes. Your strong arms engulf me, and there I want to stay. The comfort of those arms is tranquil, We fit together, so well, in every way. Our hearts beat as one, Our souls are entwined. The sun is shining down upon us, showing us this is Love. I feel your Love when we are apart, I hear your words as I work. My thoughts now make me smile, Remembering something you said. I'm yours for eternity, Growing 'old' together. I Love you more than I have ever Loved, And this will only continue to grow. I'm so glad we're both not afraid to let this show, Your sweet smile & those eyes tell it all. As, I know, mine do I am now and shall remain 'faithfully' yours, --(I LOVE YOU)-- post comment

.... [01 Dec 2003|10:05pm] My one and only Valentine... Everything began, with a look from a passenger seat. Now when I think of you, my heart skips a beat. I never would have thought that you would have chosen me But now that you have... I know that we were always meant to be. Every morning as I wake, I swear to the beautiful sunshine That no matter what day it is, I would die if you weren't mine. I can't help but to notice that my heart has taken a fall And every minute of every day, I want you... that's all!! I can't express in words just how much you mean to me Because when you are near, my emotions run wild and free. They travel to a place that is so special and true Right to that very place where nothing comes close to you... It feels like heaven when I feel your soft and gentle touch Whenever we are torn apart, I can't help, but miss you so much. The only thing left to confess is that I'm so happy you are mine And I only want to say, "I love you" to my one and only Valentine!! post comment

.... [01 Dec 2003|10:05pm] I am alone... wishing you were here to talk to wishing you didn't hate me I am reading our old love letters... wishing you still loved me wishing the words you spoke of our love were still true I am thinking of the day you left me... wishing I could have stopped you wishing it was my arms you ran into, not hers I am staring at your picture... wishing those gorgeous eyes were gazing at me wishing those perfect pink lips were gently touching mine I am trying to forget... wishing the pain would end wishing I could find someone new I am dying... wishing you had stopped me wishing you hadn't made me do this *** Is There Love Out There IS THERE LOVE OUT THERE THE TRUE LOVE THAT COMES FROM THE HEART THAT'S SO HARD TO GIVE AND TO RECEIVE TODAY THE HURT AND PAIN GO SIDE BY SIDE SO MUCH TO GAIN AND YET SO MUCH TO LOSE LIFE WAS NOT MEANT TO BE ALONE AND LONELY SO THE CHANCE MUST BE TAKEN FINDING THE TRUE LOVE IS A MARVEL FINDING FEELINGS YOU THOUGHT WERE FORGOTTEN I CHOOSE THE WONDER AND THE SPLENDER OF IT ALL IT'S SO GOOD TO FEEL LOVE AND TO BE ALIVE post comment

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[01 Dec 2003|10:05pm] When I close my eyes I dream of you... Can`t sleep at night `cause I wanna be with you... Don`t want to live, don`t want to cry Without you by my side... When I go to sleep at night I ask God to make my days bright... I know he will do it - I know it is true... Because he knows I only want to be with you... I hear your voice inside my head... I can imagine us together again... I know it will happen - I know it is true; Because I asked God if I can be with you... I see you and me together again; Holding hands and feeling the pain... What a beautiful feeling - I wish it were true... But I am only dreaming - dreaming of you... *** post comment

[01 Dec 2003|10:05pm] 1. Optimists apgalvo, ka mees dziivojam pashaa labaakajaa pasaulee, bet pesimists baidaas, ka taa arii i... 2. 30% no savas dziives cilveex pavada miegaa, bet 70% nomodaa, cerot izguleeties... 3. Pat ja juus esat uz pareiza celja, juus samiis, ja wnk seedeesiet uz taa... 4. Dziives pieredze - taa ir kaudze ar zinaashanaam, kaa nevajag riikoties situaacijaas, kas nekad vairz neatkaartosiez... 5. No riita daudz vieglaak i pieceltiez, ja uz modinaataaja uzliek pelju slazdu... 6. Ar gadiem cilveeki taisa mazaak muljkjiibu - ne taas iespeejas vairz... 7. Lai taffi vaardi neatshkjirtoz no darbiem vai nu klusee vai neko nedari... 8. Lai atstaatu iespaidu uz apkaarteejiem beerni censhas izliktiez vecaaki, viirieshi - gudraaki, sievietes - jaunakas un dumjaakas... 9. Ja nezini ko gribi - dabuusi to, kas paliek paari... 10. Vieniigi nedaudzus interesee tas, ka teff i ko teikt... 11. Tava kultuura i tas ko tu dari, kad teffi nevienz neredz... 12. Vecumz i tad, kad gribi, bet neatceriez vairs ko un kaapeec... 13. Vecaakiem miilestiiba, bet mumz peec tam jaadziivo... 14. Dziivot i lapi, bet lapi dziivot i veel lapaak... 15. Ja tu esi tik gudrs, kaapeec neesi bagac?... 16. Jo lielaax cuuka, jo vairaak izrok... 17. Niff neatrisinaamu probleemu - i nepatiikami risinaajumi... 18. Kameer septinjas reizes meeriisi, cic jau nogrieziis... 19. Kas smejas peedeejaiz, tam wnk leeni pielec... 20. Riic iesaakaas lapi - es pamodos... 21. Izsmeekjeeta cigarete saiisina dziivi par 2 stundaam, izdzerta degviina pudele - par 3 stundaam, bet darba diena - par 8 stundaam... 22. Ja esi sastapis savu sapnju sievieti, no paareejiem sapnjiem vari atvadiitiez... 23. Miilestiiba i nevis tad, kad teff atnes ro*u pushkji un tu to osti, bet tad, kad teff visu dienu staasta par 93. markas benziinu un tu klausiez... 24. Ja teff kaut ko gribaz - padomaa kaapeec teff taa liidz pat shim briidim veel niff... 25. Gribeetoz, lai ne tikai gribeetoz... 26. Visi neizvietojamie cilveeki beigu beigaas nokljuust kapoz...pievienojas kluseejoshajam vairakumam taa sakot... 27. Sieviete ir gatava uz visu miilestiibaz deelj, pat miileetiez...Viirietiz i gatawz uz visu miileeshanaas deelj, pat miileet... post comment

[01 Dec 2003|10:05pm] I promise I not to hurt you, Because you`re already hurt. I promise not to leave you, Because you`re already lonely. I promise not to forget you, Because you`re already fading. I promise not to ignore you, Because you`re already invisible. I promise not to betray you, Because you no longer trust. I promise always to love you, Because I know you need me to. I promise not to hurt you, but please don`t hurt yourself... post comment

te i dazjas atzinjaz... [01 Dec 2003|10:05pm] Daudziem ,kas savas dziives laikaa staaveejushi uz pjedastaala,peec naaves nekad netix uzcelts piemineklis /P.Beranzhee/ *** Lai neviens neidomaajas,ka pasaule vinju gaida kaa glaabeeju. /Geete/ *** Sakraajiet savu beernu asaras,lai vinji vareetu taas liet uz juusu kapa. /Pitagors/ *** Visdziljaak cilveeku sirdiis speej ieskatiities taas acis,kas visvairaak raudaajushas. /E.Ozhesko/ *** Dazhreiz mees atrodam mierinaajumu arii zaudeejumaa,bet dazhreiz ruugti apraudam ieguvumus. /Shexpiirs/ *** …ja kaads neieredz cilveekus,kas atrodas par vinju augstaak,ja kaads ieniist cilveekus,kuriem ir lielaakas praata speejas nekaa vinjam pasham,-taads vienmeer palix viduveejiiba. /Stendaals/ *** Cilveekam vajadziigi 2 gadi lai iemaaciitos runaat,un 16 lai iemaaciitos tureet meeli aiz zobiem. /L.Feihtwangers/ *** Pieredze ljoti biezhi raada,ka cilveeki visnevariigaaki ir savas meeles priekshaa. /B.Spinora/ *** Nav nekaa nozheelojamaaka par taadas sievietes dziivi kas pratusi buut vieniigi skaista. /B.Forstenels/ *** Iedvesma nav siljkje,kuru var iesaaliit uz ilgiem gadiem. /Geete/ *** Kauns no citiem cilveekiem ir labas juutas,bet veel labaak ir - kauns pasham no sevis./Ljevs Tolstojs/ *** Neviens nedara paari citam cilveekam paaridariijuma deelj,bet gan pashlabuma,patikas,goda deelj…kaa lai es dusmojos uz cilveeku par to ka vinjsh sevi miil vairaak nekaa mani? /Fr.Beekonz/ *** Miilestiiba ir kaarshu partija, kuraa visi kraapj : viirieshi lai vinneetu,sievietes lai nezaudeetu. /Akfreedc Hichkox/ *** Patmiiliiba ir kaa biezhsh priekshkars stapr mums uz muusu kljuudaam. *** Bailiigs draugs, biistamaaks par ienaidnieku. *** Striidos noskaidrojas patiesiiba un atklaajas….muljkjiiba../Jezups Laganowskis/ *** Kas tevi nemiil,tam neko neizdariisi pa praatam. Nerunaajot nemaz par to kas neieredz. /J.L/ *** Kameer cilveeks sleepj nepatiikamu patiesiibu par seviim, vinjsh veel nav zaudeejis veeleeshanos kljuut labaaks,nekaa ir. Kad saak ar to dizhoties, tas noziimee,ka ir atmetis visas iluuzijas shajaa sakaraa. / J.L/ *** Meedz teikt: vajag dziivot taa,lai muuzha beigaas nekas nav jaanozheelo. Bet vai tas ir iespeejams? Tur taa nelaime,ka tikai ar laiku kljuust redzams ko un kaa iisti vajadzeeja dariit.Kad vairs neko nevar groziit. /J.L/ *** Katra nelaime vienam - sagaadaa laimi kaadam citam. /J.L/ *** Nav svariigi ko par tevi saka.Svariigi ko domaa. /J.L/ *** Ir arii taads nekauniibas veids : neluugtam ierasties ciemos un veel justies apvainotam,ka saimnieks nevelta tev pienaaciigu uzvediibu. *** Kuram cilveekam gan nevar atrast kaadu truukumu vai vainu - viss atkariigs no taa,kuram tos mekleejam. /J.L/ *** No miilestiibas nemirst…mirst no nemiilestiibas.. *** Tuvums vada miilestiibu.Taalums to pastiprina. Tikai ja tas nav paaraak ilgs. /J.L/ *** Sagaadaajot vinjam vienu smagu paarbaudiijumu peec otra..liktenis neaizmirsiis arii sho - pashu smagaako : vinju piekraapa draugs. /J.L/ *** Ir daudz jaazin lai zinaatu cik maz zin../J.L/ *** Visi cilveeki ir tikai cilveeki. Kaut kas vairaak reizeem liekas tikai tie kurus nepaziistam tuvaak. /J.L/ *** Patiesiibas dalaas izdeviigaas un neizdeviigaas..pirmaas reklameejam..otraas sleepjam. /J.L/ *** Labaak kluseet un izskatiities stulbam, nevis atveert muti un to pieraadiit. *** Nekad nestaasti draugam visu, jo zini, ka draugam arii ir draugs. *** Nesaki neko, paklusee. Vienkaarshi labi,ka Tu esi pasaulee. *** Taa nav miilestiiba, kura naak gadiem kjircinaat un gadiem plosiit, Miilestiiba taa kaa zibens naak- atnaak balta, uzliesmo un nosit. *** Neviens viirietis nav tik gudrs, lai netiktu piemulkjots no sievietes. *** Es skumstu bezmeeriigi peec Tevis, un manas luupas izmisumaa kliedz. *** Nav negliitu sievieshu. Ir tikai nepiemeeroti viirieshi. *** Sieviete vieglaak atdziist savas kljuudas, taadeelj rodas iespaids, ka vinjas vairaak kljuudaas... /Dþ. Lolobridþida/ *** Asaru meedz buut daudz mazaak, ja ir ar ko kopaa izraudaaties. *** Kas ir miilestiiba? - salds briinuma laasts un naaves un dziiviibas staasts. *** ..tikai galva man, par spiiti manai gribai kaa pljauta pukje kriit pie kaajaam MIILESTIIBAI. /I. Ziedonis/ *** Veel nav dzimis Zemes virsuu cilveeks,kas nedos visu savu muuzha laimi par dziives pavasara skaisto pukji- MIILESTIIBU /A. Skujinja/ *** Dievs cilveekam daavaajis miilestiibu, kas vieno visvientuljaako cilveeku sirdis. Cilveeks miil, ilgojas, ciesh, priecaajas... Jaabuut labam, labam, lai Tu buutu cieniigs to uznjemt savaa sirdii.. *** Vai taa nav laime- no riita pluukt rasotu pukji un bez vaardiem to nolikt uz miiljotaa cilveeka sliekshnja...? /Z. Maurinja/ *** Es eksisteeju tajos, kurus miilu. /Z. Maurinja/ *** Kad divi cilveeki miil viens otru, kad vinji ir laimiigi un jautri, un viens vai abi rada kaut ko iisti labu,vinji pievelk cilveekus, tieshi taapat kaa spozha baaka naktii pievelk gaajputnus. /Hemingvejs/ *** Neviens nava taa veerts lai mees raudaatu, un ja ir taa veerts tad vinjs neljaus mums raudaat... *** Katram no mums ir dalja no meeness. Katram ir sava tumshaa puse,kuru nevienam neraada. /M. Tvens/ *** Mees visi esam radushies miileeshanaas rezultaataa, un tas ir viens no dabiskaakajiem procesiem cilveeka dziivee. /"Cosmopolitan"/ *** Viirieshi ir kaa sunji- muuc, skries pakalj, skriesi pakalj- muks. *** Katram cilveekam ir sava nakts, bet, jo tumshaaka nakts, jo kveelaakas riitausmas ilgas. /Z. Maurinja/ *** Nobody is perfect. I am nobody.:) post comment

miiljais ... [01 Dec 2003|10:05pm] skatos uz tavu bildi un censhos domaat to visu labaako... ja vien tu buutu sheit shovakar...es nezinu,kaa lai dziivoju bez tavas miilestiibas.tu esi vieniigais manaa sirdii un es par tevi nespeeju paarstaat domaat.es palieku traka, kad tevi neredzu. tu biji mana pirmaa miilestiiba,mana patiesaa miilestiiba, mana iistaa miilestiiba.dziivot, fantazeejot par tevi un mani- taads nau mans dziives meerkjis. dzilji sirdii es zinu, ka tur esi tikai TU. es veelos Tev sekot visu savu atlikusho dziivi. kad tu neesi man tuvumaa es juuku praataa,,,,vai tieshaam tu nesaproti, ka es veel joprojaam ceru, ka tu buusi sheit...? tu esi padarijis mani aklu, iemesls kaapeec es elpoju esi tikai tu! es veeleetos ticeet visam ko tu saki, jo tas izklausaas tik labi.. es pavadu savas dienas domaajot par tevi, es pavadu naktis domaajot par tevi- tu esi tas deelj kaa es dziivoju. vieniigais ko es veeleetos ir tureet tevi cieshi sev klaat un buut ar tewi dienu un nakti..tu redzeesi, ...tu man esi un buusi vieniigais, tu padari mani traku.. es nepazinu miilestiibu liidz paraadijies tu,,es tevi nekad neaizmirsiishu!!!!! tu neredzi manu ceriibu caur manaam saapeem, tu neredzi manu prieku caur manaam asaraam... es negribu raudaat tevis deelj, piedod, ja es taa daru. ja vien tu buutu sheit shovakar, es izdariitu visu, es atdotu tev savu pasauli, es gaidiitu muuzhiigi, lai tikai buutu tava. tikai pasauc manu vaardu un es buushu tur, lai pieraadiitu to, cik ljoti man tas ruup.. es tevi miilu kaa maaku, miilu no visas sirds, miilu taadu kaads tu esi .. tu man vienmeer buusi vislabaakais!!!!!!!!!!! post comment

upe [01 Dec 2003|10:05pm] UPE ir miglains vakars...viss tik auksts, peleeks...veejsh. salts un stiprs. paskatos pa logu- taalumaa peleeki maakonji..driiz buus lietus-es nodomaaju. koku galotnees jau vareeja redzeet,kaa veejsh saak puust stipraak,,, un tad es atceros par Vinju. sirds sazhnjaudzas lielaas saapees... es varu vinju aizmirst, viss buus kaartiibaa-es atkal pie sevis nodomaaju, kaut gan patiesiibaa zinaaju, ka nespeeshu vis. tik ljoti man saap, es veelos aizmirsties.. no visa. pilniigi visa. es gribu, lai mani visi uz kaadu briidi aizmirst- lai es nekad neesmu bijusi.Lai neesmu existeejusi, miileejusi, cietusi, raudaajusi.. mana sirds mokaas. gribu aiziet uz upi,jo taa mani vienmeer nomierina. varbuut arii shoreiz taa man paliidzees tikt galaa ar mezhoniigajaam saapeem sirdii, kas kljuust katru sekundi arvien necieshamaakas. ak, kaa saap... tik ljoti, ka aciis paraadaas asara. maza, nevainiiga asara. taa leenaam saak sliideet lejup pa manu vaigu..un tad otra asara..treshaa.. kaklaa sazjnjaudzas saape.saaku raudaat.... atkal paskatos pa logu- aaraa leenaam saak pilinaat lietus. un taalumaa zibenjo... varbuut laiks ir tieshi taads,kaa es tagad juutos? varbuut arii mana sirds saapees zibenjo un asaras- tas ir tas lietus??? neee, buus labi. nomierinaashos. es aizgaaju un apseedos istabas stuurii..tas bija ljoti tumsh. un taa ir pat labaak. es tumsaa juutos vislabaak. shodien man tumsa patiik.. neee, es taa nevaru!!es meloju pati sev! nevaru vairs mieriigi seedeet. domas plosa manu praatu, saapes sirdi zhnjaudz. tomeer ieshu uz upi. taa mani vienmeer ir nomierinaajusi. varbuut arii shoreiz taa mani mierinaas, pazheelos... izeju aaraa no maajas.. stiprais veejsh rauj manus matus uz visaam puseem. nu jau liist. stipri. lietus laases sitas manaa sejaa... seja ir slapja no lietus un manaam asaraam. joprojaam raudu. bet tas nekas. man jaanokljuust liidz upei, jo tikai tur man buus labi. ir auksts... esmu gjeerbusies plaanaas dreebees,taapeec man salst. tik ljoti , ka juutos gluzhi kaa sasaldeeta leduu.. viena un pamesta. auksta. zibenjo.visapkaart man. nespeeju vairs paiet,veejsh ir stipraaks par mani. man vairs nau speeka nekam. nau speeka ne miileet, ne iet, pat ne dziivot. esmu nogurusi.no visa. paskatos tumshajaas debesiis... zibens!!! nobijos...un atkal atceros vinja seju. saapes nekur nau pazudushas, taas laikam nekad mani nepametiis. saaku skriet... gribu aatraak pie upes. pie manas miiljaas upes. raudu. saap...ak, kaa saap...skrienu paari visaam peljkeem.kaajas paliek slapjas, pirksti salst... pati drebu. nezheeliigi.tas nekas. aatraak janokljuust liidz upei. sirdii juutu ka taa ir pareizi. taa jaadara.. kaads mani velk uz turieni...celjs nau viegls. viss ir tik tumsh.. manaa jaunajaa sirdii liesma ir nodzisusi. uz visiem laikiem. tuvojos upei... viss tik druums. baisi. tik slikti nekad ieprieksh nebiju jutusies. pashai paliek bail no sevis. kas nu buus?? ko es tagad dariishu?? vai speeshu to visu iztureet??? varbuut... ja man pietiks speeka. bet taa ir tik maz..baidos. ilgojos peec Vinja. gribu Vinju sev atpakalj. nelaimiiga miilestiiba ...pirmaa miilestiiba. taa vienmeer ir tik ruugta. tik saapiiga. nespeeju to paciest. ... beidzot esmu pie upes...joprojaam liist.. stiprais veejsh loka koku galotnes,smiltis iet pa gaisu... apseezhos uz akmenja un domaaju.. kaapeec? kaapeec tas viss taa???? kaapeec tieshi es? kaapeec MAN ir jaamokaas, kaapeec mazajai sirsninjai ir taa jaaciesh??? taa ir jaapazheelo, nevis jaadara paari. ak miiljaa upe, saki ko lai es daru- es nodomaaju...acis saap no raudaashanas, bet asaras nemiteejas. taas ir ruugtas saapju asaras. taas liis paar maniem vaigiem muuzhiigi..nelaimiigi... skatos upee.. taa skjiet tik tumsha, baisa. bet nespeeju neraudziities tajaa. acis nespeeju noveerst no taas...un domaaju..atkal... es nedriiksteeju vinju miileet..taa nebija pareizi. bet es nespeeju nemiileet tevi. tu man biji (un esi) kas iipash par spiiti visam. es tev speetu visu piedot. visu. pat to, ka uz shiis nezheeliigaas pasaules atstaaji mani vienu. pameti mani, bet pats aizgaaji tur, kur ir labaak.. tur kur nau saapju un cieshanu. varbuut arii man tur nokljuut???..domaaju....... gar upi zogas diivainas eenas. varbuut man reegojas?varbuut. domaas meegjinu beegt no taam projaam, bet nespeeju. nespeeju pamest sho vietu. joprojaam skatos uudenii..dzelmee... atminjas. tik skaistas, tomeer saapiigas. ....raudu. joprojaam. slauku ar nosalushajaam rokaam asaras. kjermenis , skiet, ir sastindzis no saapeem. sirds saak aardiities... saapes kjermenii kliedz. viss paliek tik vienaldziigs...ir pilniigi vienalga, kas notiks,.gribu buut laimiiga. gribu satikt miiljoto cilveeku. negaiss aardaas... upe trako. taa manii vairs neklausaas... taa mani ignoree... un tas ir pats saapiigaakais. "upe!!!!! luudzu..luudzu neignoree mani. atbildi tachu!!!!!!!!!!" es kliedzu. vienaa mirklii es sastingu. skatiijos dzelmee, taa mani sauca. skita, ka kaads mani sauc, aicina pie sevis. nee, man izliekas. MAN IZLIEKAS!!! iespeejams, juuku praataa...bet acu skats joprojaam bija dzelmee. sirds saspringa, kjermenis vairs nekontroleeja sevi. visapkaart auksts uudens, ...truukst gaisa. nepretojos. ... taa vilnis pieglauzhas krastam....tumshie taalumi gaist...aiz maakonjiem paraadaas saule. klusums. klusums pie upes. muuzhiigs... post comment

vientuliiba [01 Dec 2003|10:05pm] Vientuliiba. ko iesaakt ja taas ir par daudz? ja taa neatlaidiigi min uz papeezhiem, neljaudama apstaaties,,,? Liekas,tas bija tik sen,kad vaardu VIENTULIIBA Vinja lasiija tikai graamataas, tagad tas bija ieraxtiits arii Vinjas dziivee... vinja tupeeja savaa istabaa uz griidas. stuurii aiz skapja. un skatiijaas vienaa punktaa..vinjas rokas triiceeja. vinja visa triiceeja. mati bija izpuurushi, acis saraudaatas, galva reiba. acis vairs neraadiija skaisto. aiz loga bija tumsh , preteejaas maajas logos vairs tikai retajaa spideeja gaisma, jo bija jau ljoti veels.Debesiis mirdzeeja zvaigznes it kaa smaidot kaadam. pa retam vareeja dzirdeet mashiinu motora ruukonju.. maajaas visi jau bija katrs savaa gultaa un bija jau sen aizmigushi, tikaI vinja bija nomodaa, vinja mociijaas ar bezmiegu.. vinjai bija vajadziigs laiks, lai dabuutu Vinja seju aaraa no galwaz... vinja izliida aaraa no aukstaa stuura un , smagiem soljiem, devaas uz gultas pusi. galva vinjai saapeeja, acis bija aizpampushas no raudaashanas, mute izkaltusi... uz gultas malas pie spilvena vinja vienmeer tureeja iespraustu adatu, dazhreiz pat vairaakas.. vinja nesaprata, ko vinja dara.... vinja saaka ar nagiem skraapeet kreisajai rokai aadu. vinja saknieba zobus un skraapeeja tik stipri, cik vien vareeja... tad vinja atcereejaas par adataam kas atradaas netaalu no vinjas... vinja vienu izvilka , un, pa saskraapeeto vietu uz rokas, novilka stipri ar adatu,,tas saapeeja!!!!!!tad vinja saaka durstiit aadu, liidz paraadiijaas daudz mazas asins pluusmas... vinja aizveera acis.un domaaja.. par vinju.. atveerusi acis, vinja redzeeja saskraapeeto aadu, taa "dega".... vinja aizmirsa visu pasauli...vinjas probleemas uz mirkli pagaisa. tachu tikai uz iisu mirkli..vinja bija atradusi liidzekli kaa uz iisu briidi pazust no pasaules...aizmirsties...vinja redzeeja reetu uz rokas un ar visu sirdi un dveeseli pieveersaas tai...... mierinaaja, runaajaas ar to, liidz saprata.... shii nodarbe vinjai bija kljuvusi kaa narkotikas. kad reeta vairs tik ljoti nesaapeeja, vinja atkal un atkal to histeeriski skraapeeja, liidz saapes vinju aizraava uz citu pasauli.. vareetu jautaat: ""Kaapeec??? kaadeelj????? " .. bet miilaa cilveeks nejautaa.. ja tikai vinja saprastu,ka nau veerts sevi mociit. ja vinja gribeetu- to visu labotu. bet vinja to negrib!!! es zinu- vinjai ir bail... vinja sevi mierina ar domu,ka cilvekiem dazhaadi liktenji lemti.. ir taadi,kam liktenis veel briesmiigaaks..censhas sev iestaastiit, ka vinjai veel nau tas sliktaakais variants. miilestiiba- taa ir slimiiba, kas dzelj! vinjai ir zheel.Zheel Pasaules dveeseles, jo tai jaaredz,kaa vinja ciesh, kaa miil, kaa shaubaas, kaa domaa.. arii VINJSH pasaules dveeselei sagaadaa daudz cieshanu, taa ciesh caur vinju...ja nebuutu kaada cilveeka, Vinjai nebuutu taa jaadomaa, jaajuut un jaaciesh. jauniibas likums ir miileet un ciest!! vinja aizveera acis, kad vinjsh vinju skaara.vinja aizveera acis, kad vinjsh vinjai dariija paari.. tagad caur sevi vinja censhas atriebties vinjam...nee, TAA NAU PAREIZI!!!!!! ir jaadziivo.. laime pienaaks.,....noteikti!!! arii tad, ja pazaudeeta!!!! 1 comment|post comment

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