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[Jun. 13th, 2008|10:55 am] |
If I lived in the land of the blind, I'd tell everyone I had one eye, even if I didn't. I mean, who's gonna know, right? And just like that -- free kingdom!
Carolyn Rosser
Who's to say that my soul mate isn't a dancer? I intend to check out every topless bar in the tri-state region, just to make sure.
Wiley
The Top Hassles of Living Next Door to a Famous Actor
- Always dropping over to borrow a cup of heroin.
- Bad scripts always wind up on my side of the fence.
- Smelly fumes from the burning $20's in their fireplace.
- Whenever their latest movie flops, housing prices go down.
- Won't mow his lawn until he finds his motivation.
- Annoying door-to-door plastic surgeons always knock at dinner time.
- Not only won't apologize for boinking your wife, but asks for another go since "I think I can do it better this time."
- Toddlers wandering into your back yard to forage for food while mommy is out clubbing.
- Your 12-year-old daughter makes more at her babysitter job than you do as a Department Manager.
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