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[Apr. 18th, 2008|02:48 pm]
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The Top Signs Your Doctor Is Behind the Health Curve

- Pours whiskey on your oozing wound, then takes a swig.
- "Have you applied the leeches exactly as I told you to?"
- He feels that a pound of red meat each day will make your blood good and red.
- "That would be a dollar fifty, thanks."
- "Do I have aides? Of course I do! The nurse, the office manager, the filing clerk..."
- There's a jar with a sign, "Have a syringe, leave a syringe. Need a syringe, take a syringe."
- Recommends *filtered* cigarettes.
- "HMO? Who you callin' gay, jerk?"
- Regularly neglects to overbill Medicaid.

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