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[Jun. 11th, 2009|10:33 am] |
Since I've become a parent, I've discovered that you can learn a lot from a child. For instance, I've gotten much better at spitting out my food.
Kevin Freels
It's funny how our tastes change as we grow up. I hated tomatoes as a kid but can't get enough of them now. And the same goes for spankings!
Stephanie S. Thompson
The Top Signs You Have Too Many Social Networking Friends
- By the time you get through posting the birth announcement to all your social networks, your newborn is four years old.
- The first thing you do in the morning is check all your friends' status. And then you go to bed for the night.
- Osama bin Laden and Rush Limbaugh have both requested to be your friend.
- Your friends meetup is held in Yankee Stadium.
- After being alerted to the existence of your Facebook account, the NSA begins an investigation since you are clearly bent on world domination.
- Every time you Tweet, neighboring states experience rolling blackouts.
The Top Ways That "Survival of the Fittest" Resulted in Species in Designer Colors
- Elephants have evolved into a gray color so that they can be unnoticed standing alongside roads in order to steal peanuts from passing vehicles.
- Chameleons have evolved a green color so they can hide against green foliage. No, wait, make that they're brown so they can hide on sticks. No wait, they're green...
- Tabby cats have evolved their striped gray color to lurk in the shadows and scare the crap out of you when you walk by in the morning.
- How else are Dalmatians suppose to hide in a blizzard full of blinking Polar Bears?
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