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[Dec. 18th, 2009|12:52 am]
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Session Start: Thu Dec 17 23:12:18 2009
Session Ident: #halcegame
03[23:12] * Now talking in #halcegame
03[23:12] * irc.holonet.org sets mode: +nt
03[23:12] * Joins: Max (~Max@pool-96-249-153-111.hrbgpa.fios.verizon.net)
[23:12] I am here.
01[23:12] <@Halceon> Woot
03[23:12] * Joins: Monochre (~Monochre@24-107-18-46.dhcp.stls.mo.charter.com)
[23:13] My name is Enrique Iglesias.
[23:13] You have killed my father.
[23:13] Prepare to die.
[23:13] What do you want?
01[23:14] <@Halceon> Max attacks with "Annoying wail". It is super effective.
[23:14] Critical hit!
01[23:14] <@Halceon> Monochre loses 0.2 HP.
[23:15] I run away.
01[23:16] <@Halceon> It is super cowardly.
01[23:17] <@Halceon> Ok, ok, ok.
01[23:17] <@Halceon> So, what you guys need are archetypes.
01[23:17] <@Halceon> There will be no stats or anything, but i need to know what role do you play in this adventuring party of 2.
[23:18] I fulfill the role of King.
[23:18] I can't stay long
[23:18] I have to leave in... 40 minutes.
[23:18] Will that be enough time
01[23:18] <@Halceon> Probably not, but i don't care.
01[23:18] <@Halceon> This need not get finished.
[23:19] um, okay.
[23:19] Also I am very bad at staying focused in roleplaying games
[23:19] I usually get bored early on
01[23:19] <@Halceon> So, Monochre is a fat noble with a knack for aluminum bracelets, got that.
[23:20] Indeed
[23:20] I am very kingly
[23:20] Hmm can I be a latin pop star heartthrob
01[23:20] <@Halceon> Sure, why not.
[23:20] siii mi amor
01[23:20] <@Halceon> What are your three most distinct features as a character?
01[23:20] <@Halceon> 1) Speaking spanish
[23:20] yes
[23:21] there is a medium-to-large mole on my cheek
[23:21] also i am very sexy
01[23:21] <@Halceon> noted
[23:21] and i sing.
[23:21] 1. My organs are surrounded by so much fat that I cannot be slain by ordinary knives. You have to get the big swords.
[23:21] 2. I have a Crown.
[23:22] 3. I am jolly and benevolent, and I love the parties.
01[23:23] <@Halceon> After several weeks of travel the King and his personal Jesterbardheartthrob arrive at the family adventure camp in Trumpetink.
01[23:23] <@Halceon> Well, more precisely they arrive at the place indicated on the map.
[23:24] Wonderful!
01[23:24] <@Halceon> The area looks somewhat depressing. The grass is dry, the trees are dead and the ground is littered with bones from various land and water creatures.
[23:25] These poor animals. Back in my home country we do not disrepsect nature in this way.
01[23:25] <@Halceon> To the north a river runs, going through a small hillock. To the west they discern a towerlike structure that could be the place they seek.
01[23:26] <@Halceon> To the east and south the same bleak landscape stretches on to infinity.
[23:26] We must adventure to this castillo.
[23:26] Enrique, please do remind me of what noble mission has brought us to this place.
[23:27] [ What are our character's names? ]
01[23:27] <@Halceon> [I have no idea]
03[23:27] * Monochre is now known as KingBlenry
01[23:27] <@Halceon> [Apparently Enrique and KING]
[23:27] (Blenry, to other Kings)
06[23:28] * Max shrugs
01[23:28] <@Halceon> How do you proceed?
03[23:28] * KingBlenry is now known as Monochre
06[23:28] * Max points at the tower
[23:28] My gut instinct, it tells me we must adventure to this place.
[23:29] I think there are many beautiful women in here. They are calling to me.
[23:29] It is possible, old friend. Let us venture forth!
01[23:29] <@Halceon> Thus agreed, the duo ventured forth.
01[23:30] <@Halceon> They neared the towering structure, which was adorned with ramparts at the top rim, when a stunty person ran past them, bearing another stunty person on its shoulders.
[23:31] Oye!
01[23:31] <@Halceon> The borne one looks rather dead.
[23:31] Seńor! Where are you going!
[23:31] Halt, in the name of a King!
01[23:32] <@Halceon> The stuntie ignores Enrique's melodical inquiry and ducks around a corner.
01[23:32] <@Halceon> From somewhere atop a shrill voice cries out:
01[23:32] <@Halceon> "The King? I didn't vote for you!"
06[23:32] * Max pursues stuntie
[23:33] Well, no, of course not. Kings are not voted for, they are instated by divine will!
01[23:33] <@Halceon> Making a sliding turn, Enrique rounds the corner, but the stuntie is gone from sight.
01[23:34] <@Halceon> On the other hand, he does find himself standing on a grate.
06[23:34] * Max inspects grate
01[23:35] <@Halceon> The grate is heavy, made from dolomite and deeply embedded into the ground.
01[23:35] <@Halceon> There is some sort of room beneath it.
06[23:35] * Monochre follows Enrique.
01[23:36] <@Halceon> There is also a small hut a little way to the north, which nobody had noticed until yet.
[23:36] Let us adventure into this hut. I can feel the presence of women there.
06[23:36] * Max points at hut
[23:36] Indeed!
01[23:37] <@Halceon> Impressed by Enrique's epic pointing, the King joins him in the short walk to the hut.
[23:37] I do hope there is a suitable throne.
[23:37] I am becoming rather tired of all this running and shouting.
01[23:37] <@Halceon> The hut stands at the edge of a downward slope. There is no obvious way to get inside it, only very, very narrow windows.
06[23:37] * Max peers in a window
01[23:38] <@Halceon> There is also a double row of statues extending from it over the slope.
01[23:38] <@Halceon> With a steep drop in between the 2 rows.
06[23:38] * Max softly hums a traditional Latin song from his youth.
01[23:38] <@Halceon> The inside is dark, Enrique only makes out the lights from the opposite window.
06[23:39] * Monochre cleans some grit out from under his fingernails.
01[23:39] <@Halceon> The grit runs away.
06[23:39] * Max knocks loudly on the side of the hut.
[23:40] Hello? I am here to set you free!
01[23:40] <@Halceon> The hut resounds melodically from the knock. Alas, no hidden door opens. Nor does anyone reply.
[23:41] I wonder what sort of crazed mason would construct a hut with no door.
[23:41] Si, es muy extrańo...
01[23:41] <@Halceon> But wait!!!
01[23:41] <@Halceon> A female voice is heard.
01[23:42] <@Halceon> Though very unclear, the sound seems to be coming from the valley to the west.
06[23:43] * Max points epicly to the west.
[23:43] Hark, Enrique! A maiden calls to us!
[23:43] We must save her, for she is in grave danger.
[23:43] Let us once again venture forth!
01[23:44] <@Halceon> And thus the duo briskly trots down the hillside. They don't run, however. Kings don't run, ever, and Enriques are too weak to run.
01[23:44] <@Halceon> They arrive to a strange sight.
01[23:46] <@Halceon> The two rows of statues are actually mounted atop walls. The heroes being on the south side of the both of them. In front of them (westward) is a paved square with five collumns. There are some chests and bins there.
01[23:46] <@Halceon> The two walls end shortly before it.
06[23:47] * Max rummages around in the chests and bins
01[23:48] <@Halceon> Enrique procures a finely-crafted cave spider silk robe and an uncountable amount (probably 7) rope reed socks.
03[23:48] * Joins: freedomgeek (~79d15835@holonet.org)
01[23:48] <@Halceon> None of which match.
06[23:49] * Max dons robe and two of the socks, handing the rest to Blenry.
01[23:49] <@Halceon> There are also various bars of metal, but the gentle mind of Enrique pays no attention to them.
06[23:49] * Monochre places one sock on each point of his crown, to keep them from getting dirty.
[23:49] I wonder if there are any dwarves nearby.
01[23:50] <@Halceon> There are also several crowns in the bins.
01[23:50] <@Halceon> All made from bone.
[23:50] I doubt it. It is not the way of dwarves to leave their possessions standing in the open.
[23:50] Perhaps it is here for the purpose of trading
[23:51] Hmm.
06[23:51] * Max looks to the north
[23:51] I believe I do not wish to trade my crown for any of these others.
01[23:52] <@Halceon> There is only a crude windmill to the north.
06[23:52] * Monochre peeks between the two statued walls.
01[23:52] <@Halceon> However, from the square the pair has gained a clear sight to the area between the walls. There seems to be an entrance into a cave or cavern of some sort.
[23:53] A cave!
06[23:53] * Monochre calls into the cave.
[23:53] Hallooooooo!
01[23:53] <@Halceon> ...allloooo
06[23:53] * Max rushes toward the cave with reckless abandon
01[23:53] <@Halceon> ....alllooooo
01[23:53] <@Halceon> ...lllooooo
01[23:53] <@Halceon> ...ooooo
01[23:53] <@Halceon> ..oo
01[23:53] <@Halceon> ...o
[23:54] Goodness.
01[23:54] <@Halceon> Enrique recklessly runs headfirst into a doot
01[23:54] <@Halceon> *door
01[23:54] <@Halceon> Oddly enough, it only covers half the entrance.
06[23:54] * Max falls flat onto the ground with a thump.
01[23:54] <@Halceon> There is no other door.
[23:55] Aiiii, mi cabeza
[23:55] (Halceon, are we dungeon-crawling your Dwarf Fortress map?)
01[23:55] <@Halceon> Maybe?
[23:55] [lol that's what i thought]
[23:56] Be careful, my dear Enrique.
[23:56] Am I bleeding?
06[23:56] * Max touches his forehead
[23:56] Hmm, no.
[23:56] But it feels like I am! Aiiii
01[23:56] <@Halceon> ...aiii
01[23:56] <@Halceon> .iii
01[23:56] <@Halceon> ...ii
[23:57] Alas. We must explore this cave.
06[23:57] * Max gets up, slowly, and opens the door.
[23:57] I hope that we are not accosted by ruffians.
01[23:57] <@Halceon> The door won't budge.
01[23:57] <@Halceon> It seems to be locked.
06[23:57] * Max jiggles the doorknob forcefully and knocks on the door
01[23:57] <@Halceon> Or maybe it's the skinny complexion of the bard
06[23:58] * Monochre walks around through the other half of the entrance.
01[23:58] <@Halceon> {curses! I was writinig that!}
06[23:58] * Max gives up.
01[23:58] <@Halceon> As KING passes the empty doorway, the floor behind them drops open
01[23:59] <@Halceon> The pit only has a slope to climb out in their direction, the other side seems inaccessible.
01[23:59] <@Halceon> Oh, and there's a man with goggles and a lab coat in the pit.
Session Time: Fri Dec 18 00:00:00 2009
[00:00] Greetings, sir scientist!
[00:00] Seńor. We are here to save you.
[00:00] Who... Who are you people?
06[00:00] * Max sings loudly
[00:00] I am Enrique!
01[00:00] <@Halceon> A dead bird falls from the sky.
06[00:01] * Max does a dance to accompany his singing.
01[00:01] <@Halceon> There is blood coming out of its... ears.
01[00:01] <@Halceon> {i think there's a better word for that, but meh}
06[00:01] * Max picks up the bird and offers it to SCIENTIST.
[00:01] Are you hungry, friend?
[00:01] Well I'm Dr David Bose, I was working on ultracold atom research when I ended up here for something
[00:01] Not really
06[00:02] * Max shrugs and tosses the bird aside.
03[00:02] * Joins: Hamann (~chamann@c-76-109-105-139.hsd1.fl.comcast.net)
[00:02] WHat's all this then?
01[00:03] <@Halceon> Meanwhile KING has been looking around, hasn't he? Oh yes he has. He has noticed two rooms to the left and a turn to the right further on.
[00:03] I am a King, Max is a Latin Pop Sensation, freedomgeek is Dr. David Bose, and Halceon is a Narrator.
01[00:03] <@Halceon> The narrator waves at the group from the sky.
[00:03] Um
06[00:03] * Max waves at narrator
06[00:04] * Monochre makes a kingly gesture of acknowledgment to the narrator.
01[00:04] <@Halceon> {while wearing a crown covered in socks}
[00:04] [Of course]
[00:04] (They are crown-cozies!)
01[00:05] <@Halceon> The good doctor climbs out of the pit and the three glare boldly at the tunnels before them.
[00:06] Oh dear.
01[00:06] <@Halceon> THrough intense glaring Enrique notices something scribbled on the wall.
[00:06] I shall be Glory-Be-Unto-The-Deep-Ones Salem.
[00:07] I... I grew up in a religious family.
[00:07] In New England.
06[00:07] * Hamann waves at the narrator.
[00:08] This place doesn't look very civilized...
01[00:08] <@Halceon> Engraved on the wall are women and Enrique. The women are calling to Enrique. The image relates to the latest European tour of Enrique in the year 1999.
[00:09] lol
[00:09] You know, I've never talked to a woman.
06[00:09] * Hamann stumbles out of an alcove.
01[00:09] <@Halceon> Suddenly everyones mind is wracked with abhorrent images of gibbous moons and nightmarish polips. A plural voice resounds through their consciousnesses:
01[00:09] <@Halceon> "...i am the gate, I am the key.."
01[00:09] <@Halceon> And the alcove disappears.
01[00:10] <@Halceon> There are now several colorful BUBBLES floating in the air.
06[00:10] * Max tries to pop the BUBBLES
[00:10] Um. Hello?
[00:10] Hail!
06[00:10] * Hamann doffs his buckled hat.
01[00:10] <@Halceon> The bubbles evade Enrique's grasp.
[00:11] I am Blenry, a professional King.
01[00:11] <@Halceon> They mock him.
06[00:11] * Max jumps and reaches for the bubbles
06[00:11] * Max grunts with the effort
[00:11] I'm, Uh, Glory Salem.
06[00:12] * freedomgeek peers deeply into the bubbles remembering his lectures on soap bubble physics
01[00:12] <@Halceon> The bubbles get scared and float away, deeper in the bowels of the earth.
[00:12] Professional... Uh... Eldritch Abomination hunter. Uh, yeah, that's right.
[00:13] I, um, hate those Cosmic Horrors. Right.
[00:13] Are there any such creatures about, Mr. Salem?
[00:13] Follow them! They seem to have sapience! We must categorise them!
06[00:13] * Max sings Livin' La Vida Loca to the newcomer, by way of introduction.
06[00:13] * Hamann shifts his feet from side to side.
[00:13] Or sentience at least
[00:13] *On his feet.
06[00:14] * Hamann stares in horror at the latin pop sensation and points.
01[00:14] <@Halceon> Dr. Bose jogs a mighty jog around the bend and finds himself lost. The bubbles have disappeared.
[00:14] There's One!
[00:15] Dang!
06[00:15] * Hamann pulls out his Necronom... BESTRIARY OF EVIL THINGS THAT SHOULD BE KILLED.
01[00:16] <@Halceon> The tunnel grows wider beyond, with a deep pit on the eastern side and menacing arrow slits in the wall behind it. It extends south into darkness.
06[00:16] * Hamann sifts through the pages spasmodically.
01[00:17] <@Halceon> Meanwhile the Pop sensation, the KING and the fellow from Innsmouth stand around, throwing silent insults at each other.
[00:17] He's uh, definitely in here somewhere; Dar'minhalthop, Crier in the dark? Hescrinastik, Last of the Blind?
[00:17] No...
[00:18] Um. I'm terribly sorry, I can't find your page.
01[00:18] <@Halceon> "Crier in the dark sounds about right," the narrator interrupts.
[00:18] Mr. Salem, I shall have you know that my court bard and latin pop sensation is not an eldritch abomination!
[00:19] Oh! Thank you, um, disembodied voice. (Have they finally gotten to me? Is my mind finally shattering? Ahhhhh!)
01[00:19] <@Halceon> "No problem"
06[00:19] * freedomgeek peers into the darkness
06[00:19] * Max sits down.
[00:19] Tengo sueńo. Those bubbles were a real work-out.
[00:20] Butbutbut, he, um, he sings the Foul Tunes of the Darkest Evil.
01[00:20] <@Halceon> The tech-savvy eye of Dr. Bose discerns a raised plate right at his feet, probably connected to some mechanism or another.
06[00:20] * Hamann finally decides to take in his surroundings.
[00:20] Hmmm
[00:21] What could this be connected to and in what fashion?
[00:21] Where, um, am I- are we, anyways?
[00:21] I know not.
01[00:21] <@Halceon> Mr. Salem notices that he is standing at the entrance to some underground compound, there is only one door that partially covers the way to the oubliette outside. Also, there are two doors in the northern wall and further down the corridor, Dr. Bose is kneeling where the tunnel turns south.
06[00:22] * Hamann backs away from the Crier in the Dark, towards Dr. Bose.
[00:23] There seems to be a mechanised plate of some sort here.
01[00:23] <@Halceon> Glory accidentally bumps into David, who promptly falls flat on his face. Right on the raised plate.
[00:24] Oof!
06[00:24] * Hamann falls flat on his back, arms windmilling.
01[00:24] <@Halceon> A bolt shoots out from the wall, flying safely above Dr. Bose's head and slamming tightly into Salem's Nec.. Great Bestiary.
[00:24] Oh dear
[00:24] Time to fall back
01[00:25] <@Halceon> Dr. Bose falls back up from the ground.
01[00:25] <@Halceon> With SCIENCE!!
[00:25] No! My book!
06[00:25] * Max snores quietly from the ground
06[00:26] * Hamann lies on his stomach and tries to pull the bolt loose from the Necr... BESTIARY
01[00:26] <@Halceon> By the divine powers vested in him, the Narrator drags the unwitting Enrique into one of the rooms by the robe.
01[00:27] <@Halceon> Mr. Salem procures a +carp bone bolt+
[00:27] >Study +carp bone bolt+ for ELDRITCH SORCERY
[00:27] [Can't let it leak out!]
[00:28] Study +carp bone bolt+ for science!
01[00:28] <@Halceon> There is no eldritch sorcery. "That's just silly. Magic doesn't exist," the disembodied voice of Narrator comments.
01[00:29] <@Halceon> There is, however, some science in the +carp bone bolt+. Dwarven science, to be exact.
01[00:30] <@Halceon> Upon closer scrutiny, Dr. Bose identifies this +carp bone bolt+ as one of the +carp bone bolts+ [25] produced after the drowning chamber experiment #89.
[00:30] Magic? No, not magic; the darkest heart of every star contains it, waiting to escape, to devour us all. The world is nothing, nothing compared to its dark majesty, and it will destroy us all, enveloping us in foul light.
[00:30] So, magic.
[00:30] Actually fusion occurs in the core of a star
[00:30] And I don't think it can be classified as dark
[00:30] No, magic is when a guy pretends to pull a quarter from behind your ear.
06[00:31] * Monochre is called off for urgent business back in his kingdom.
[00:31] (I think I've had enough for today.)
[00:31] [Professional kingdom?]
01[00:31] <@Halceon> And disappears in a microcline-blue puff of plot and real life.
[00:32] AH!
[00:32] Where'd that man go?!
01[00:32] <@Halceon> David Bose and Glory Salem aren't the least surprised by this.
[00:32] [Glory-Be-Unto-The-Deep-Ones is surprised by everything]
[00:33] Well of course I'm not
[00:33] The science of plot teleportation is well documented
[00:33] [ gtg ]
[00:34] Clearly he was under some Squamous Influence.
01[00:34] <@Halceon> The haunting sound of a baby's shuffling gait echos from afar.
[00:35] Arg!
[00:35] I hate babies!
[00:35] The Shufflers On The Ground come!
[00:35] I hold the bolt like a dagger ready to stab the baby
[00:35] Ready yourself!
01[00:36] <@Halceon> You see the tyke crawl out from the darkness to the south.
06[00:36] * Hamann brandishes his book
01[00:36] <@Halceon> It crawls toward you at a terribly slow pace.
03[00:36] * Parts: Monochre (~Monochre@24-107-18-46.dhcp.stls.mo.charter.com)
06[00:37] * Hamann throws a rock at the baby and begins to run away.
[00:37] When it is past those traps I stab it in the neck with my bolt!
01[00:37] <@Halceon> But wait! It stops half way, shuffles to the pit on the side and throws itself down.
[00:37] Oh goody!
01[00:37] <@Halceon> Must have been a very depressive baby.
[00:38] It sacrifices itself for the Crier in the Dark!
[00:38] Clearly there are horrors within these walls that warp even the sociopathic mind of a baby!
[00:38] We must study them!
[00:38] No! To study them only brings madness!
[00:39] I'm already mad, can't get any worse.
01[00:39] <@Halceon> And with thos words, spurred by SCIENCE herself, the good doctor leaps over the trapped plates.
01[00:39] <@Halceon> *those
[00:39] They shall warp your frail mind, turn you into a shade of what once was!
[00:39] I just tried to stab a baby for crying out loud!
[00:39] A monster draped in your flesh!
[00:39] [I love the ridiculously overwrought sentences of Lovecraftian fiction]
01[00:40] <@Halceon> And just to add emphasis, the Dr. cries out loud.
[00:40] I love science!
[00:40] That baby was lost to the Crier; you will join it if continue down this path!
[00:41] Sacrifices have to be made in the name of science!
[00:41] You will wake the Dreamless Dreamers!
[00:42] Your arrogance will destroy us all!
[00:42] [You am play gods!]
[00:42] Then I can study their psychology!
01[00:42] <@Halceon> From his forward position, David senses an odd smell. Something like a mixture of rum, beer, vomit, blood and xpig tail socksx, only infinitely more pungent.
[00:43] They will eat your brain, and take sustenance from your memories!
06[00:43] * Hamann tries to bar the way.
[00:43] I push forwards.
[00:43] For science!
[00:43] [So I found an HP Lovecraft story starring Harry Houdini]
[00:44] You easily push the scrawny fanatic with you.
[00:44] [It is the Best Thing]
[00:44] How do I push myself!?
[00:44] With Science?
01[00:45] <@Halceon> The two grown men keep trying to push each other, then themselves then the walls and whatever else there is.
[00:45] With that Dr David Bose disappears in a puff of logic back to his research and his wife Kimiko.
[00:45] Got to go.
[00:45] It's 6:45 AM
[00:45] See ya.
01[00:45] <@Halceon> Byes
[00:45] Oh jesus
[00:45] That is too early
[00:45] And I haven't slept
[00:46] Sleep then!
01[00:46] <@Halceon> They achieve a chaotic movement in the general direction of south. Suddenly a loud *CLICK* comes from beneath their feet.
03[00:46] * freedomgeek is now known as FG|away
01[00:46] <@Halceon> Moments later several sections of wall collapse and a blast of searing hot air hits them.
[00:47] The Clickers Beneath the Feet! It's worse than I thought!
01[00:48] <@Halceon> Paralysed with surprise the two are slowly encased in hot magma.
[00:48] Old Ones, save this worm from death and I shall release you from your Imprisoned prisons!
06[00:48] * Hamann slowly sizzles.
01[00:48] <@Halceon> Several months later dwarves make a fortune selling incredibly lifelike statues of two humans.
01[00:49] <@Halceon> *obsidian statues
[00:49] Did they carve murals of dwarves being trampled by elephants on the statues?
[00:49] Seems like the kind of thing dwarves would do.
[00:50] Well, I need to head out; work to be done.
[00:50] See ya
01[00:50] <@Halceon> Good bye
02[00:50] * Quits: Hamann (~chamann@c-76-109-105-139.hsd1.fl.comcast.net) (Remote host closed the connection)
Session Close: Fri Dec 18 00:51:35 2009
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