| a worthy mention |
Sep. 27th, 2010|03:18 pm |
ņemts no TheOtherAnna (http://www.formspring.me/theotheranna):
"Q: Do you think finding someone to try to spend your life with (or at least a pleasant chunk of your life) is really that important? I find myself grappling with with whether I really care that much or not. Is it okay to just be alone?
A:It is so ok to be alone.
I am not an anti-social person. I don't hate people, or feel scared around them (most of the time). But i do consider myself a peaceful person. I am quite content to be alone physically, and in terms of a relationship.
Of course there is always media pressure to be in a relationship, and it's not always advertising. Movies and book plots usually centre around the hero falling in love by the end of it, and then they life happily ever after. Which, according to today's divorce rates, just doesn't happen.
It's my personal opinion, and it comes from my life experiences, but I think people really need to be at peace with themselves before they can enter into a healthy and lasting relationship. If someone is seriously depressed and they're looking for someone to "save" them, it just doesn't start well and ends even worse. There's a complex power shift that goes on when one person needs to be "nursed" whether it be through self-esteem or money or what have you.
When you assess where youa re in your life, and decide that you're not perfect, but at least happy or content with how things are, then you can decide to search for a partner. And if you're at peace and don't need to add someone to your life, then don't. Enjoy yourself and the joys that life brings you. It's not totally necessary to have someone around to share them with. You don't need to worry about feeling more fulfilled with someone else around, or that you are somehow experiencing less without them. From my experience, it's not true." |
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