runāja zaralustra un reizēm klusēja

2 0 1 5 . 0 1. 1 9 - n o t e s , s e l f - a n a l y s i s

Sun, 08 May 2016 12:33:34 GMT

I love life. I am not fond of war. My newly (relatively) discovered love for games might partially be to blame – in my half-voluntarily involvement into things I really am not fond of.
Wanted to write that I've got trouble of working through the rules of various games. Actually it is the opposite. I tend to probe the situation inside out, until I swim like a fish in it. Rather lazy fish, I must admit. Inpatient. In the current situation (attacked) often insecure (as I'm often driven by cliffs). Preferred course of actions to be played out – quite unpredictable, if one remains in thinking about it as a game, doesn't matter – one likes to dance, with no disrespect to the game. And has strong moral values. Or at least so one believes. Unshakable core in long term. Countless attempts have been made to deface me and my morality [go to hell with your morality! a scream is heard outside, and something ceramic being smashed] Once opponent (if one exists) has become aware of me dancing around a system of cubes (but weirdly, I intuitively dance my way through almost knocking over just a couple of rules (think pillars, marble), opponents (empirical experience shows) have turned hostile and chosen to take me down by brutal force, using combinations of games from outside the agreed rule-set. Really, it's pretty nasty. Especially if happens without a warning and ends with a 1 against 5 (as in - outnumbered), metaphorically hitting me till I fall, sometimes marking their victory with a monkey-business type of personal (based on observations and my still at times very naive trusting in strangers) humiliation. Penetrating my head with things from the rule-sets brought in from outside games, but not presenting them as such. That is to say not identifying that they've defeated you with an unfair advantage. I don't have time to recognize that – first of all I'm a dancer, second I don't want to face the fact that I understand the game in a different way (although it does not stand in the way of playing it, even – playing it with success – that is to say success is nothing unusual), being psychologically hard to face (yes, I have underlying psychological issues that have not been attempted to solve the right way (without allowing myself to dance with them, because of the possibility messing the resolve with (like messing apples with oranges)). And, really, what was the problem, doc?
Secure of course. Regarding the outer world. Most of my issues are personal. And I try not to let them interfere with other peoples comforts. I've always thought that I'm one big pain in the arse for the humanity.

Here we go to the love/hate relationship with oneself. And as has come evident – I am pretty self-destructive. The degree to which my psyche or whatever dresses (legitimizes hurting oneself, rationalizes it) this self-torture/slo-mo murder up is terrifying (in a very virtuous manner, involving a lot more than the obvious). Here must add that it has gotten a lot, lot worse during the last years (5-6 years).
Cause of the dibua (really – a catastrophe, from some viewpoints, certainly). Unprofessional staff around me. Well. Unless they're Gestapo officers.

Thoughts flow and flow. And flow. Well. It all is everywhere. I know you will again try to prove me that you can make me appear wrong in my eyes, using a dirty mind-fuck trick, but sorry, you sure you don't have no dick issues? :D

Returning to the games theme – not being able to learn the games original rule-set (could be a viewpoint from which one sets off to find his way in that game (yes, I tend to see shortcuts, I tend to see links between things that are not there to a regular eye – and miraculously I am often right. The logical capability lag is killing my well-being though. And likely the experience of the game as well. But that being a bad thing is, yes, you could debate about that.
I, for example will mask up that I don't understand something (in cases when I for sure know that trying to understand that is beyond my physical limits), I'll sooner devote my full efforts into working a way around.

Here there is a humane conversation. About how that impacts the game experience overall.
There my narcissism might have laid it's foundations. As I have always knew – it is not a malicious type of narcissism. Rather survival mechanism.
Conclusion? It's a fucked up world. A fucked up world.
Dear God. Dear God. Yeah, doc, I understand that I'm the one who's seriously fucked up. As well.
If I am to put this to some practical use, I'll have to leave my ego and longing for literary satisfaction (a little extra), speaking frank – seeking self-assertion in a process where one tries to work out how to cooperate with ones mind better – not a wise thing to do. Indeed. It's illogical as well. Seeking to approve that with which there (you know for sure) something is wrong (because, it HAS made my existence unnecessarily hard at times). But by inertia still falling back to ignorance or denial – yes the twisted thing that even during this process. Yes, it might show that I have not yet understood to the bone what and why I'm doing here. But being able to keep honest to oneself in these first steps – that's a good sign. I'm proud of myself. :D

I might not know how to wipe my arse one day. But the phenomena is there where I still will be able to make judgments about serious things. With an unshakable confidence in my moral compass. Weird. I'm not guessing.

Tendency to oversaturate things. Fear of going blind comes to mind.
I really hope that my shrink is present here.

That ego-pumping seeking approval of ones unconventional being and understanding of things – I propose that it is due traumatism. And my self confidence having been absolutely destroyed. In terms of – functioning in society. I can live with myself at peace – agree. Problems start where I have to face oh, the huuuumanity. ;D
That, yes, I am resentful to it. That is to say – I see through it pretty well for my age. And it has hurt me really badly. And I've got bright grey hair. Terrible, really.
I don't know if I even should have started. To realize ones helplessness against all this fucked-upness and the regular Joes and Dollies simply not being gifted with enough senses and observational powers to see the railings (mostly I tend to see what is wrong – I am not great at creating (lol, really, contributing to existing foundations, replicating them (BECAUSE THEY'RE F-ING IMPERFECT, and I see the threads. (The absurdity – thing that makes me mad – is the “not being able to connect” the dots about so many things that appear self-evident to my eyes) of this shit we are all spinning in. :D

Yes, there is a large crack between me and the society. But I love it.
See my place in helping to improve it. So people like me should not face those huge gaps/cracks. And the regular Joes and Dollies wouldn't be so stupid. And I (If I could travel back in time, or be born again more likely) would not become as fucked up as I've become (essentially – because of this society being disfunctional/barely functional).

Yes, Purr. What hides the monster underneath his facade? I hope that nothing. Seriously.
Yes, this really is not the best way to live on this planet. I know it, you are almost sure that I'm right. But you don't care much. Because the stream goes on. And it's not that bad after all isn't it? If you're a good gear. It must not be that bad. Although to my eyes, so many people appear useless and dead to me.
No, I do not want to hurt them.

The problem is that this society has taken a wrong turn. Or – is driving drunk. And really – see a bit of myself in there. Care not about it. But here's the difference. I don't care because I am one and you are many (at the same time I care so bad, I would like to scream sometimes), you are many and supposedly functioning properly together as a system of gears (I like the organism comparison better too, but it's a bit too complicated for me at the moment, and possibly sabotages my shining as one smart motherfucker in the end of the paragraph). I lost my plot. Thank you. This was fun. I guess this is the easy part.

Contribution to society. Yes, utterly I feel pretty useless as a gear of the main-frame. I am a man of special talents. And need a special place. And no, I have no aspirations like total world domination.
The only thing that worries me – if I really were to take on helping the world, this society, I had to commit to sacrificing myself completely – at the very start point understanding that I might not see the fruit of my efforts, also it sure is not an easy task.

Here's the masochistic aspect of it (the way I view life and the way I tend to whirl around, in it) again.
Not that I like it. But not that I find anything wrong with this commitment and care about this fucked up :DDD useless :DD society. ;D

Seems that I have calculated that it is the best possible thing I could do, before I die. Here's the trick, the suffering I'd have to bear. Not that I like it. And not that I dislike it.

Here's the problem. It does bug me. Round and round I go. But so voila. That it seems to be valued highly – without deceit or anything else of the sorts.

Unless I am an utterly fucked up individual since I was born. Brrr.

:D That doesn't seem to be logical. Or probable. Or anything.

Yeah, I'm a misfit. But it does not impair my moral judgment. It is hard to explain. The bright gray hair start to sound like a vinyl tune. Well. Again. Phenomena. And now I'll save, close and put on Depeche Mode – Silence. Thank you for your time, gents and ladies. :D

I'm ready to give up on making the world a better place with the condition that the world can make me a better.. place. The trick here is that, knowing myself, it doesn't end. But, I presume, could become easier to bear.

If one wants to help to predict where my Mr. Self-Destruct would emerge next – first thing to do – identifying possible issues I have not mentioned. Because not being aware of them to the necessary degree. Or simply ashamed of them and running against a wall in denial, in the process pretending to dance Moon-walker. ;D I will have to review it myself, yes. Because some of it is written down in a way that only I could understand it [the location and nature of the problem] precisely [cause – broken grammar, short vocabulary]. Yes, that you could read something I have written, but understand something completely else. If else – good. What I meant was – different. ;D

Kind of – developing a technological platform – to be ones aid if one wants to get through his tangled personality. To be used either at home (danger on the way, wiiiiiiuuuu wiiiiiiiuu). Or as an aid while visiting a therapist or a psychologist. That is what I thought of. But did not want to write it down – beacause of fear of the idea really being shit, but me not realizing it because of not being able to see this science/field in a vast enough perspective. Lack of expertise. In depth and mass of knowledge. Being able to oversee, reckognize and foresee patterns.

Apologize about my broken English here and there.

likās, ka ieliku arī te, bet izrādās - te vairs nekā nav vai arī internets (traffic'a dēļ) aizrijās

Sat, 02 Apr 2016 18:30:00 GMT

Let's dance. Possibly maybe.

The truth is that you want to go to the same destination - peace, prosperity and stability. Something's in the way. This game. That's been bent to a nut house grandeur level. Way too aggressive. And way too aimless (same old bling and pussy, and ratrace - such moral standards do not set constructive rules for this game [yeah, not even talking about the fact that it's 5 minutes till (expression) the end of time (with no way back)]. The point is not winning. The point is being happy. In global terms. Becoming more happy by playing in a way that makes you happier and guarantees you a certainly brighter future. Well yes, that way begins (most likely) at the end of our comfort zones.

When you rule the world – you certainly should be thinking about this experience we call life [here someone throws a stone at my head, turns out it's a philosophers stone and we start and keep up a mindfull discussion allthroughout the rest of our lives, where truth is born (having an argument between friends)], keeping in mind the generations to come (these days we barely have the means to keep track ourselves and possibly our kids in mind (capital M)). Not like sending a postcard (timecapsule, accumulated capital, in example) but by being a more responsible human being.

The world can not handle itself anymore (sustainability – but here a wiser heads must chip in). As I already said - slow down. And do not try to f each other over – in example when the other has had the balls to slow down, knowing that life is not a fairy tale and one could get a knife in the back for having allowed oneself such luxury only kids have – naivety, carelessness, and being open for new horizons (and, of course, not having a fear to be stabbed in the back). A chance to create tomorrow, instead of yielding to ones human, let's call them, vulnerabilities, (the main insane step being – irresponsibility and failing to see that the time is now and that world spins faster than it ever has before (remember my autistic view on what politics are (poly-tics, exactly what it is, lol) .
If we act like shit people, we indirectly encourage such behavior in the rest of the collective (because that is the only way to get/stay in the spotlight and get ahead at such circumstances.

Where's the biggest problem? That when we knew enough to have and drive a motorized vehicle that can reach up to 300kmph, we forgot to remember that which we, obviously, never truly knew – the role of morality in our lives. No one would have thought that being a dick would have such far reaching consequences. Allowing our moral standards to become weakened (whatever moral standards you had), has become a threat in the presence of (WHERE THE F*** DOES THIS COME FROM IN YOU?) evel drive on the world.

Values have become distorted, threatened or none.

Not even talking about that thing that would seem outrageous to some - washing our dirty laundry. In the process managing not stabbing each other in the back (as washing a gigants dirty loundry is no easy task, and might be difficult in many ways [SO LET'S NOT MAKE IT ANY HARDER). And preferably be forthcoming when you see that you could make the process easier for your – opponent. Which is really an opponent only in that pragmatic world of yours that doesn't fit in my vocabulary, when you're laid back – your opponent is your partner.

What do I mean with this all. That you should evolve from rivalry to partnership. Not taking the "kick" out of this "game". Just making sure that all the players are players indeed, not some kind of gang of corrupt moral perverts.

You know what I mean. And I know for sure that I'm way cooler than John Lennon - regarding specifically your type of people (where some change really can be achieved and, hey, I am not a threat to you, just a bit of a pain in the arse, my apologies).
I apologize, if this seems to be layed out a bit too superficial.
But really, that is how simple I see it. It's – commitment, time, enthusiasm. And re- establishing morality in ourselves. I, already, stated the (in my opinion) worst problem we are facing - that morality not being able to form itself in a human being naturally. Because of it simply being such a rarity to come across. So there is nowhere to get a "hang of it". That hazy cosmic jazz. :) That allows us to choose between right and wrong. The driving force. Perfect sense.

I am open to a version that morality is still here – it's just different. But you can pretend that I have the capability logically counter-argument that. So, really – I am not.

https://soundcloud.com/m-rti-jonass/lets-dance-possibly-maybe-and-the-truth-is-that

es no savu piezīmju google translate tulkojumiem uz krievu val. te dabūšu infarktu, smejoties

Sat, 02 Apr 2016 18:24:29 GMT

"Давайте потанцуем. Возможно, возможно.

Истина заключается в том, что вы хотите идти в том же направлении - мира, процветания и стабильности. Что-то в пути. Эта игра. Вот был согнут до уровня величии дурдоме. Путь слишком агрессивным. И слишком бесцельные (та же старая Bling и киску и Ratrace - такие моральные нормы не устанавливают конструктивные правила для этой игры [да, даже не говорить о том, что это 5 минут до (выражения) в конце времени (без пути назад)]. Дело не выигрывает. Дело в том чтобы быть счастливым. в глобальном смысле. как стать более счастливым, играя таким образом, что делает вас счастливее и гарантирует вам, безусловно, светлое будущее. Ну да, начинается тот путь (скорее всего) в конце нашей зоны комфорта.

Когда вы править миром - вы, конечно, должны думать об этом опыте мы называем жизнью [здесь кто-то бросает камень в моей голове, оказывается, что это камень философов, и мы начинаем и поддерживать дискуссию mindfull allthroughout остальной части нашей жизни, где рождается истина (с аргументом между друзьями)], имея в виду грядущие поколения (в эти дни у нас едва хватает средств, чтобы следить за себя и, возможно, наши дети в виду (капитал M)). Не так, как отправка открытки (TimeCapsule, накопленный капитал, в примере), но, будучи более ответственным человеком.

Мир не может справиться с собой больше (устойчивость - но здесь мудрее головы должны скинуться). Как я уже говорил, - замедлиться. И не пытайтесь F друг друга по - в примере, когда другой имел шары, чтобы замедлить, зная, что жизнь не сказка, и можно было получить нож в спину за то, что позволил себе такую роскошь только у детей есть - наивность, невнимательность, и быть открытым для новых горизонтов (и, конечно же, не имея страха быть удар ножом в спину). Шанс создать завтра, вместо того, чтобы уступить одних человека, давайте называть их, уязвимые места, (главный безумным шаг существо - безответственность и неспособность видеть, что время настало, и что мир вращается быстрее, чем когда-либо раньше (помните мой аутист мнение о том, что политика (поли-тики, именно то, что она есть, лол).
Если мы будем действовать, как дерьмо людей, мы косвенно поощрять такое поведение в остальной части коллектива (потому что это единственный способ, чтобы получить / оставаться в центре внимания и получить вперед при таких обстоятельствах.

Где самая большая проблема? То, когда мы знали достаточно, чтобы иметь и управлять транспортным средством, которое может доходить до 300kmph, мы забыли вспомнить, что мы, очевидно, никогда по-настоящему знал - роль морали в нашей жизни. Никто не мог подумать, что, будучи член будет иметь такие далеко идущие последствия. Учитывая наши моральные стандарты, чтобы стать ослаблены (независимо от того моральные принципы у вас), стала угрозой в присутствии (где F *** ЛИ это взялось в вас?) Evel диск на мир.

Значения стали искаженные, не под угрозой или нет.

даже не говорю о том, что вещь, которая может показаться возмутительным некоторым - умыть грязное белье. В процессе управления не колоть друг друга в спину (как мытье Гиганты грязный прачечную не является легкой задачей, и может быть трудным во многих отношениях [ТАК ДАВАЙТЕ не делает ее более жесткой). И желательно быть предстоящее, когда вы видите, что вы могли бы сделать этот процесс проще для вашего - противника. Что на самом деле противник только в этом прагматичном мире твоего, что не вписывается в мой словарный запас, когда вы отведены назад - ваш противник ваш партнер.

Что я имею в виду с этим все. Что вы должны эволюционировать от соперничества к партнерству. Не принимая "удар" из этой "игры". Только убедившись, что все игроки игроки на самом деле, не какая-то банда продажных моральных извращенцев.

Если вы понимаете, о чем я. И я знаю, что я круче, чем Джон Леннон - относительно конкретно ваш тип людей (где некоторые изменения действительно могут быть достигнуты, и, эй, я не угроза для вас, просто немного боли в заднице , мои извинения).
Прошу прощения, если это, кажется, быть положенным вне немного слишком поверхностным.
Но на самом деле, то есть, насколько просто я это вижу. Это - обязательство, время, энтузиазм. И заново установить нравственность в себе. Я, уже, заявил (на мой взгляд) худшую проблему мы столкнулись - что мораль не в состоянии сформировать себя в человеческое существо естественным образом. Из-за этого просто быть такая редкость встретить. Таким образом, нет нигде, чтобы получить "повесить его". Это туманное космический джаз. :) Это позволяет нам выбирать между правильным и неправильным. Движущая сила. Отличный смысл.

Я открыт к версии, что мораль до сих пор здесь - это просто разные. Но вы можете делать вид, что у меня есть возможность логически контраргумент, что. Так что, на самом деле - я не являюсь.
Davayte potantsuyem. Vozmozhno, vozmozhno.

Istina zaklyuchayetsya v tom, chto vy khotite idti v tom zhe napravlenii - mira, protsvetaniya i stabil'nosti. Chto-to v puti. Eta igra. Vot byl sognut do urovnya velichii durdome. Put' slishkom agressivnym. I slishkom bestsel'nyye (ta zhe staraya Bling i kisku i Ratrace - takiye moral'nyye normy ne ustanavlivayut konstruktivnyye pravila dlya etoy igry [da, dazhe ne govorit' o tom, chto eto 5 minut do (vyrazheniya) v kontse vremeni (bez puti nazad)]. Delo ne vyigryvayet. Delo v tom chtoby byt' schastlivym. v global'nom smysle. kak stat' boleye schastlivym, igraya takim obrazom, chto delayet vas schastliveye i garantiruyet vam, bezuslovno, svetloye budushcheye. Nu da, nachinayetsya tot put' (skoreye vsego) v kontse nashey zony komforta.

Kogda vy pravit' mirom - vy, konechno, dolzhny dumat' ob etom opyte my nazyvayem zhizn'yu [zdes' kto-to brosayet kamen' v moyey golove, okazyvayetsya, chto eto kamen' filosofov, i my nachinayem i podderzhivat' diskussiyu mindfull allthroughout ostal'noy chasti nashey zhizni, gde rozhdayetsya istina (s argumentom mezhdu druz'yami)], imeya v vidu gryadushchiye pokoleniya (v eti dni u nas yedva khvatayet sredstv, chtoby sledit' za sebya i, vozmozhno, nashi deti v vidu (kapital M)). Ne tak, kak otpravka otkrytki (TimeCapsule, nakoplennyy kapital, v primere), no, buduchi boleye otvetstvennym chelovekom.

Mir ne mozhet spravit'sya s soboy bol'she (ustoychivost' - no zdes' mudreye golovy dolzhny skinut'sya). Kak ya uzhe govoril, - zamedlit'sya. I ne pytaytes' F drug druga po - v primere, kogda drugoy imel shary, chtoby zamedlit', znaya, chto zhizn' ne skazka, i mozhno bylo poluchit' nozh v spinu za to, chto pozvolil sebe takuyu roskosh' tol'ko u detey yest' - naivnost', nevnimatel'nost', i byt' otkrytym dlya novykh gorizontov (i, konechno zhe, ne imeya strakha byt' udar nozhom v spinu). Shans sozdat' zavtra, vmesto togo, chtoby ustupit' odnikh cheloveka, davayte nazyvat' ikh, uyazvimyye mesta, (glavnyy bezumnym shag sushchestvo - bezotvetstvennost' i nesposobnost' videt', chto vremya nastalo, i chto mir vrashchayetsya bystreye, chem kogda-libo ran'she (pomnite moy autist mneniye o tom, chto politika (poli-tiki, imenno to, chto ona yest', lol).
Yesli my budem deystvovat', kak der'mo lyudey, my kosvenno pooshchryat' takoye povedeniye v ostal'noy chasti kollektiva (potomu chto eto yedinstvennyy sposob, chtoby poluchit' / ostavat'sya v tsentre vnimaniya i poluchit' vpered pri takikh obstoyatel'stvakh.

Gde samaya bol'shaya problema? To, kogda my znali dostatochno, chtoby imet' i upravlyat' transportnym sredstvom, kotoroye mozhet dokhodit' do 300kmph, my zabyli vspomnit', chto my, ochevidno, nikogda po-nastoyashchemu znal - rol' morali v nashey zhizni. Nikto ne mog podumat', chto, buduchi chlen budet imet' takiye daleko idushchiye posledstviya. Uchityvaya nashi moral'nyye standarty, chtoby stat' oslableny (nezavisimo ot togo moral'nyye printsipy u vas), stala ugrozoy v prisutstvii (gde F *** LI eto vzyalos' v vas?) Evel disk na mir.

Znacheniya stali iskazhennyye, ne pod ugrozoy ili net.

dazhe ne govoryu o tom, chto veshch', kotoraya mozhet pokazat'sya vozmutitel'nym nekotorym - umyt' gryaznoye bel'ye. V protsesse upravleniya ne kolot' drug druga v spinu (kak myt'ye Giganty gryaznyy prachechnuyu ne yavlyayetsya legkoy zadachey, i mozhet byt' trudnym vo mnogikh otnosheniyakh [TAK DAVAYTE ne delayet yeye boleye zhestkoy). I zhelatel'no byt' predstoyashcheye, kogda vy vidite, chto vy mogli by sdelat' etot protsess proshche dlya vashego - protivnika. Chto na samom dele protivnik tol'ko v etom pragmatichnom mire tvoyego, chto ne vpisyvayetsya v moy slovarnyy zapas, kogda vy otvedeny nazad - vash protivnik vash partner.

Chto ya imeyu v vidu s etim vse. Chto vy dolzhny evolyutsionirovat' ot sopernichestva k partnerstvu. Ne prinimaya "udar" iz etoy "igry". Tol'ko ubedivshis', chto vse igroki igroki na samom dele, ne kakaya-to banda prodazhnykh moral'nykh izvrashchentsev.

Yesli vy ponimayete, o chem ya. I ya znayu, chto ya kruche, chem Dzhon Lennon - otnositel'no konkretno vash tip lyudey (gde nekotoryye izmeneniya deystvitel'no mogut byt' dostignuty, i, ey, ya ne ugroza dlya vas, prosto nemnogo boli v zadnitse , moi izvineniya).
Proshu proshcheniya, yesli eto, kazhetsya, byt' polozhennym vne nemnogo slishkom poverkhnostnym.
No na samom dele, to yest', naskol'ko prosto ya eto vizhu. Eto - obyazatel'stvo, vremya, entuziazm. I zanovo ustanovit' nravstvennost' v sebe. YA, uzhe, zayavil (na moy vzglyad) khudshuyu problemu my stolknulis' - chto moral' ne v sostoyanii sformirovat' sebya v chelovecheskoye sushchestvo yestestvennym obrazom. Iz-za etogo prosto byt' takaya redkost' vstretit'. Takim obrazom, net nigde, chtoby poluchit' "povesit' yego". Eto tumannoye kosmicheskiy dzhaz. :) Eto pozvolyayet nam vybirat' mezhdu pravil'nym i nepravil'nym. Dvizhushchaya sila. Otlichnyy smysl.

YA otkryt k versii, chto moral' do sikh por zdes' - eto prosto raznyye. No vy mozhete delat' vid, chto u menya yest' vozmozhnost' logicheski kontrargument, chto. Tak chto, na samom dele - ya ne yavlyayus'."

Fri, 19 Feb 2016 14:21:27 GMT

stefan klocek
‏@igniting

"Don't confuse complexity with uncertainty, nor uncertainty with ambiguity; they are often related but they describe different things"

Fri, 24 Jul 2015 06:17:06 GMT

Dialogue cannot exist, however, in the absence of a profound love for the world and for people. The naming of the world, which is an act of creation and re-creation, is not possible if it is not infused with love. Love is at the same time the foundation of dialogue and dialogue itself. It is thus necessarily the task of responsible Subjects and cannot exist in a relation of domination. Domination reveals the pathology of love: sadism in the dominator and masochism in the dominated. Because love is an act of courage, not of fear, love is commitment to others. No matter where the oppressed are found, the act of love is commitment to their cause—the cause of liberation. And this commitment, because it is loving, is dialogical. As an act of bravery, love cannot be sentimental; as an act of freedom, it must not serve as a pretext for manipulation. It must generate other acts of freedom; otherwise, it is not love. Only by abolishing the situation of oppression is it possible to restore the love which that situation made impossible. If I do not love the world—if I do not love life—if I do not love people—I cannot enter into dialogue.

— “Pedagogy of the Oppressed”, Paulo Freire

Sun, 19 Jul 2015 18:37:38 GMT

"I dig. You dig. We dig. She digs. He digs. They dig... It's not a beautiful poem but it's very deep." — UT Chattanooga

Fri, 17 Jul 2015 00:55:59 GMT

Because everything's a notepad. /Al Tz. Heimers/

viva la rainis

Sat, 04 Jul 2015 20:13:44 GMT

via chaika

Police in Turkey blast pride parade with water cannons, 'accidentally create rainbow'

Mon, 29 Jun 2015 21:20:23 GMT

'Police reacts with water cannons. Karma reacts with rainbow.'

via http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/europe/police-in-turkey-blast-pride-parade-with-water-cannons-accidentally-create-rainbow-10353695.html

Mon, 29 Jun 2015 19:31:53 GMT

Today, while waiting in cue for my psychiatrist, I saw the prettiest woman I've seen in years, doing the same. Waiting in cue, I mean. I was surprised about the attraction that sparkled up in me. Because I've had stopped caring. Like - absolutely stopped caring. About anything. Despite the fact that she was completely from a different planet. Definitely, not the Kif Kroker planet. I did not care. I was enjoying the surprise. That something moved me. Great.
The rest of the time I was enjoying some nice benzodiazepine withdrawal - anxiety, irritatedness and such. It's interesting how I can divide the two experiences.
Not molding them into a single bweah.

super ghetto

Fri, 19 Jun 2015 16:59:38 GMT

I live in a super ghetto. it's remarkable (occurance of the century, really). but the super does not take the ghetto out of it. remember it.
supper, anyone? it's the last one. never.

by the way

Fri, 19 Jun 2015 04:30:25 GMT

Wonderful night. In all it's imperfection. I entered society today. Had not been out there a really long time. It's both great and terrible.

Fri, 19 Jun 2015 04:17:40 GMT

Just came up with an eureca moment. It's not the declared impossible kids that are hopeless and are gonna fuck everything up. And I gladly would contemplate on and about their assimilation. What then will fuck everything up? My so called friends from Southpark, who think they run the world. It turns really terrible, when you realize that sometimes they really do. NB
I know that the previous sentence is true about myself as well. But - you know me, right? I'm the reasonable guy to reason with. But it almost never is a picnic. Well - how you look at it. If the communique is about your dick and your brain being wicked as fuck and my helplesness in front of it - then, sure, is a picnic for the evil you. Obessety.

*clicks BET button*

Obessity leads to:
" Hypertension or high blood pressure
Dyslipidemia -– An abnormal concentration of fat in the bloodstream.
Type 2 diabetes – Insulin resistant diabetes
Coronary heart disease – The buildup of plaques in the main arteries of the heart.
Stroke – The blockage of blood flow to the brain
Gallbladder Disease – Can cause nausea and fever, caused by gallstones.
Sleep Apnea – Problems breathing during sleep.
Respiratory Problems"

*explains that the BET and the probable win is where you consider the meanings in parallels, brought to less meat and bones environment*

The but, or the butt, is where you realize that the time is now. And there really is no way to turn it down. As well as there is no time left to fuck around slapping each others dicks with a glove.

Tue, 09 Jun 2015 22:47:44 GMT

“If you speak they kill you; if you don’t speak they kill you. So speak.” /Algerian journalist/

#trendingOnTwitter

Sat, 06 Jun 2015 10:39:21 GMT

Martin ‏@martin_ssh 20m20 minutes ago
#IfIWereGodICould finally get my point across. No. Wait. I couldn't.

Wed, 03 Jun 2015 07:01:15 GMT

ibid ‏@ibid78 4h4 hours ago
[doctor] when did the pain begin?
[me] probably at the big bang

digital re-master of a picture I found online. have a nice day. and hope responsibly.

Tue, 02 Jun 2015 16:17:18 GMT

Super Flu and Dortmunder Philharmoniker - Volkwein

Mon, 01 Jun 2015 21:52:12 GMT

Super Flu and Dortmunder Philharmoniker - Volkwein (Official video)

Wed, 27 May 2015 14:00:16 GMT

If you want war, you're gonna get one. But be careful what you wish for.

yes, he is not. and it's exactly the problem

Thu, 07 May 2015 09:23:21 GMT

Happy birthday you sad, overrated motherfucker.

Thu, 07 May 2015 09:19:27 GMT

I am holding a very critical view towards the interest and naive trust Sigmund Freud has generated towards his work and persona. In my humble opinion - academically documented orgies (not necessarily in a sexual way) with cocaine, heroin, ones academic success combined with an absolutely enormous ego (it is so big, that it overshadows everything Sigmund does, it enforces a bias, possibly denying a new, exciting and, most importantly - objective truth being born (if such truth had seen light, it definitely would have been born Freud being alone (or, pardon me - whilst two gentle men beat the shit out of poor Sigmund, because of his inability to do anything else than manifest ones ego, overshadowing literally everything but itself and it's witty appeal). Unconsciously the greatness of him always is on top of his priority list. If there would be a partner to Freud's thinking (it should be "a think-buddy with whom he could loose oneself in the joy of happening together in a thought, in a feeling"), if Freud had accepted a partner in his thinking process, if he had respect for another human being, if he had given a slightest fuck about truth and psychoanalysis – we might be living in a different world.

Sadly Freuds pathological behaviour makes the thinking process a dead end, his books – a pile of pathologically ill egomaniacs notes – but still – of great value, I won't deny. Like diamonds in shit.
Truth is secondary to Freud. Simply put - Freud's dick is primary and nothing get's past Freud's dick. It matters more than truth, because little Sigmund is concerned if there is any shine and glory left for his dick after facing even a glimpse of truth. A dust of absolution. Is there life after death? The relationship between his dick shining in glory and truth putting an end to this comfort bothers him as much as life after death bothered the earliest of thinkers. Little Sigmund is scared. And burries this question deep somwhere next to - do I really want to fuck my mother and why the hell have I spent so much time thinking about it.
This truth to which one believes will never get, because one subconsciously hates oneself and has very low self-esteem. The possibility to propose a journey towards discovering something excitingly absolute, real and true together with a partner with whom one has the opportunity to happen (no such aspirations seem to radiate from Freuds personality – if something happens, it's Sigmunds dick and surrounding praise of it.
If I'd be able to travel back in time, I'd interrupt his and his partners mental masturbation session and make them dance – starting with tango, then shattering their world with rocknroll like Marty McFly does in Back To The Future. We'd be living in a different world.

The truth about Freud and his dick is – the man is so fucked up in owns issues and possibly even not aware of them or having only had a glimpse of the surface of this so scary truth. Like struck with thunder, he bounces like a ball back in his carefully designed wonderland of false purpose and self-praise and after supressing a little bit of shameful feelings turns back to delight provided by no moral obligation to restrain oneself from appearing a smartass motherfucker – embracing random nightmares with convenient, handy constructions and myths. To this purpose his scientific background serves as an unquestionable and infinite source of energy. A little nightmarish playworld of his own.

It's a matter of having the balls to face yourself. And publicly humiliate [unable to face fear and rejection?] oneself and coming to new terms with his regular environment. One requires to accredit the new-found truth in society. Needs to be able to learn to swim in it. Needs the qualities that will save him from drowning in newborn obstacles. One needs to be a decent human being. I doubt he would have made it. I think he knew it. And that's why we eat his shit today. The question is why? Mother of God, why?

This miserable necessity to justify being an asshole as a human condition, it being fine, as long as you talk about it in fancy enough terms (formula of what makes pornography pornography crosses my mind) - one has employed his drama skills to wrap this so nicely up. Irresistable. Delight. In an ill mans wonderland. That feeds you with a proposition (both conscious and open, both subconscious) that you're an intellectual human being, and your penis or vagina is most definitely if not as noteworthy as Frueds, it's still something, you know.
The tragedy here is - there is no vector here - towards healing, evolution or whatever, no vector - just the a blab about this and that - an OK to publicly manifest and masturbate ones ego in varying intensities. But it never get's anywhere. Anywhere new. Or anywhere productive - narrative-enriching exciting. You never feel that evolutionary stream touching your feet. Just an eventual numbness in the center of ones head.
Being an unquestionable person as-is of himself, cocaine must have been the thing that re-affirmed his high confidence, eventually turning it in a delusion. If you think you're the smartest asshole in the room - you're in bad company.
I die a little, having contemplated on how this man, having taken this big shit where we all eat, got away with it. Come on! We're still eating it. Is that alright? No.

Whilst writing this I inevitably noticed some shreds of parallels with my own personal development struggles. Mostly past. And inspiration to reflect on a new angle here and there. But it's not me who this is about.

updated my linkedin.com profile

Thu, 07 May 2015 03:16:04 GMT

updated my linkedin.com profile:/lv.linkedin.com/in/zaralustra

Summary:

Involved in various types of technological, scientific & humanitarian activities.
Sometimes do graphic design, desktop publishing, illustration work.
Words and pictures are my virtue. I complement one with the other with light hand and confidence.

Cheerleader of Socrates, Aristotle, David Hume, Immanuel Kant, a stripper for Carl Gustav Jung & Erich Fromm. A true brother of Martin Luther King Jr.

Holding a view that Alexander Piatigorsky was the last philosopher of modern day. Surprised and inspired by him being able to spring even under the oppressive hand of soviet and post-soviet Russia's dementia. Viewing it as a miracle, really.

Aged 23 I had the misfortune to relive and meet that very same fate of Socrates - more or less for a crime of similar nature. Differences - the suicide was forced. I survived. And 3 years later - in May 2012, "amid the unrest caused by the Greek government debt crisis, an international panel of judges and lawyers held a mock re-trial of Socrates in Athens, resulting in an acquittal of the accused."
I do believe that this trial was an honoring of my unfortunate fate and the sacrifice I had made, an honoring of everything I believe in.

Am Holding an ambition to surgically remove the unhealthy dose of Freud from our daily lives using the method of chemistry of thought, invented by myself aged nineteen, feeling like a total bad-ass, not having been rejected his order of a pint of beer and lightheartedly lighting up a cigarette that masked up the being of me then - immature, troubled boy, that did not believe he would need a psychologist. Little did I know.
Back to the main topic of this paragraph - Freud is not the father of psychoanalysis, Freud is the father of his dick in any of his colleagues and your mothers face.

By necessity am a one man partisan army in these strange times. Front-line is in the other end of the end-line. In the meantime - fuck war. Pretty much would consider myself being a human rights activist. Muffled.

draft of a formulation. of opening up a dialogue that matters, hub number one

Tue, 28 Apr 2015 07:55:32 GMT

I'm glad that at least the staff knows that I'm not insane. in case that all sounds mental - it is believable that it could be viewed as such, not unmistakeably perceivable. my apologies, I have been institutionalized by matrix.

referring to (both mine and your) human dignity, honor, an obligation not to allow your friend to get at the wheel of a car if he is drunk. and your mom. I assure you these things really do matter. nothing much else at the moment on this planet matters more than the issues touched in the previous post. what's terrible - that very few people understand the importance of being a responsible human being. especially - in times of crisis. in my opinion a very serious crisis. if we fuck up on this - I doubt that this society would continue. I'm a depressed person, but even to me it still seems way too much fun to refuse from.

from my viewpoint - we have no more than two decades left on this planet [the last 5 years would be hell on earth, but things starting to seriously deteriorate after the first decade would have already made our lives pretty miserable and certainly - very stressful], continuing on like this - passively mostly, from time to time bursting out in neurotic panic campaigns. continuing so - the planet might still pull through somehow. but will the people pull through somehow? I doubt.

we're out of touch. choking on the consequences of knowing too much about everything, sadly not knowing shit about the necessity to refurbish the architecture of education, focused on quantity of knowledge, lacking in depth and vision [you can easily call it - sense of tact], choking on greed and excessive optimism, dancing with creativity till the point it drops motionless because of you allowing that self-sufficient sparkling joy, curiosity and optimism to become distorted, forced into conformity with our regular ticky-tack. capitalism demands it. and lives are overcrowded. not necessarily with people.
how lenient you are towards the demands and temptations of making a profit - that to me, you and everyone we know is a choice. anyhow, I am certain that we're more than one step too far already. so too it is possible to loose the ability to give a fuck. the terrifying fact is - it happens slowly. there's something similar with smoking and lung cancer. the irrational idea (based in hope) that it won't or, if you're a person who believes in the concept of luck, think that it, at least hopefully, shouldn't happen with you.
so we tick and tack, slowly falling asleep to life in it's full spectrum of human experience [being human] can provide (the possibilities theoretically are endless).

you should never stop giving a fuck. don't go to sleep, not giving a fuck. the moment you stop caring - you might find yourself waking up ever closer to death. from the other end it is - falling asleep to your life. as in - becoming less attentive to it.
my chaotic reflections have run out of spark for the moment.
the main thing - you should never stop giving a fuck.
before I take my fingers off the keys, I think about when I'll meet with this thought-space again. if I would be a person that smiles often, I would smile now.
draft of formulation? a formulation of a platform from whcih dialogue can emerge. while researching and thinking about the possibilities of creating such platform one must put his ego aside. and strive to be a decent human being. the process was effortless and fun. not that it was easy, but the necessary elements somehow brought themselves together. the rest is honesty and dance.

foundations of society, last minute to have a future

Tue, 28 Apr 2015 07:48:07 GMT

http://klab.lv/users/dooora/1128306.html?view=3864434#t3864434

I wouldn't call this man and people alike simply people or teachers. They're the last hope this darned planet has. but no one has the time and courage. and what else - the ability (sooner it's a curse) to give a fuck. and no one enjoys the stability needed for a life that could be marked as lived. and it's hard to imagine for the people in charge to suddenly shift from the regular "let's hook tonight" and have a laugh about this circus happening in the background. shifting that "snot in the wind" (but who cares, if business as usual (but, really - totally NOT. there's the thing - business is not as usual. but whatever, right?) posture, would be really hard. shifting towards - being a responsible human being and a great leader - yeah, that would be nice, wouldn't it? but who likes to take on such responsibilities in times when people offer you to buy back your mother.
here, I again, this is one of the countless times I reach this exit of a problem, recognition of a problem (the problem stands in the way of any steps towards sanity) far too often (with no exit, really, just a sense of utter human powerlessness) - concluding that Russia is like a fifth wheel in a car. why? [this might sound very simplified, but:] because they just want to control people instead of governing them. and that overtone of psychopathy there - see no reason for cheering up. but still do. everyday. fight or flight.
if something has ever really mattered, then this is one of the things. weird to call them things. really terabytes of concepts and realities. getting our shit together - that truly matters.
not to condemn Russia alone - everyone pretty much f-ed up. and every single one of the giant kitties have been acting like real bad kitties. (really - worse than that - utter recklessness towards our already fucked up enough humanity/modern (ha!) civilization, society). time to digest that all. contemplate. [preferably REAL FAST! :D] and stop this madness.
and start anew. or - one might view it as simply i.e. handling a really fast car and not crashing it, killing everyone on this planet (I sometimes hate this time-wise pretty bearable schedule that we stick to when killing our children, ourselves and, really, everyone on this planet).

Rory Kurtz, illustrator & artist, U.S.

Tue, 28 Apr 2015 06:37:54 GMT

http://www.rorykurtz.com/

P.S. Rorija priekšā es noņemu cepuri. This is powerful shit. And so relevant. And so unpretentious. And so just exactly how something like this should be.