| 12:53p |
I have been having a Things havent been going well for me and Ed
I have been having a Things havent been going well for me and Ed. Well at least in my opinion. He's been very cold towards me lately and I don't know why. Last night hurt me the most when he refused to help me look for something and just spent most of the evening ignoring me. But while I was looking for stuff I found the shirt I bought for him at ACen wadded up in the back of the closet in the spare room, as if he didnt even want it. I was hurt but I put it in the back of my mind. So we went for a bike ride and I was having some trouble with my ashtma and allergies. We didnt go very far on the bike ride but I was getting super winded due to my allergies. He sugessted we go down this rode covered in trees and high grass and I just couldnt do it. I had to stop and catch my breath while he sat there about 20 feet ahead of me not even bothering to ask me if I was ok or not, then he came by me and said "well I guess we can add bike riding to the list of things we CANT do together" then started to ride off. I felt like shit. I've been feeling so horribly lately about myself because of what I am limited to because of my ashtma and allergies and even my weight, which contributes to my ashtma, I just feel so exaushted lately and it makes me feel like shit, I'm trying to hard to loose some of this extra weight I have and be able to be more active. So I basically cried the whole ride back. I don't know whats going on, I don't know what I've done and frankly I don't want to get into another fight, I just cant handle it right now. Everytime I bring things up it starts a fight and then I end up crying and he goes away. Ok I am done venting.....Fuck spellcheck. |