Estapenss - February 8th, 2014

February 8th, 2014

February 8th, 2014
07:06 pm

[Link]

[Error: Irreparable invalid markup ('<should [...] this?>') in entry. Owner must fix manually. Raw contents below.]

When a fat women comedian goes out on stage on of the first things she should do is to acknowledge she know that she is fat, otherwise it's just awkward.

What do people think about me?
Tall.
Scruffy.
Teed bit of childish.
Possibly smart, but definitely nerdy.

People notes:
Denis is nice, but says sad things.

Routine structure:
1. Obvious joke to reaffirm character.

ToDo:
1. Look into book about creative writing, there must be present techniques for that.
2. Ask about Swedish educational system.
3. Look into book about comedy writing, there must be formulas for that.
4. Read aloud in English!!! You pronunciation have

Social Dynamic:
In comedy workshop it matters how funny each statement is not how factually true. If you want something to go away, just don't react to it.

Rule of thumb:
1. re-write. cut every word you can.
2. Lie. Lie. Exaturate. Exaturate.
3. Creating working environment is imperative to success.
4. I doesn't need to be nasty, it can be funny and lies.

Note:
1. None one knows I am tall on stage.
2. Reason why I don't like them barbers. //Start with.
3. 473 - wash them.
4. When nothing can be taken away art piece is complete.

Hi!
I have some tall people problems I would like to share so you shorties and average height (?) can feel better about yourself.
1. When I buy a new dress piece. (?) I can choice either to go for: I stole them from by little brother or doing a very bad impersonation of a white rapper.
Look this is one of my best fitting shirt and you can put two of me into.
2. People meet at me like landmark at public events. I wouldn't mind, but they smoke and wind carries it in my face.
When I sit down it theater I say I sorry to people behind me, because for the most part what they will either sit like <balance on side> or enjoy my haircut.
I hate
3. And don't get me started on pants. I have washed these like 400 times before they fit enough so ladies can check out my cute ass. I have it you just need to look really hard.
and it's super hard to find new ones as I don't have much money.
Not that I don't earn enough to buy myself a pair of pants, but I have financial priorities.
<exited> For example I recently saw Imperial Start Destroy Lego set for just 600 euros. It should protect me from girls till the end of time.. <exited/>
And I all my excess money goes to my not so financially well of family. They made too many children and now they can't afford them.
I have three sisters, they attention from me and now I go onto stage to look for approval and love of you - my audience. (how to make this funny?)
I am joking I have had several awkward sexual encounters. Bout them latter.
I just completed [insert HoS improvisation] => and now you know how I feel about sports. ??? <should I even do this?>

Smokers
1. Why do smokers have more friends? Caner ward.
6. What is the easiest way to make smoker stop? Stab him.
11. Why do Asian women go for smokers? They like the yellow teeth.
14. Why do black girls go for smokers? Black lungs.
13. Why did smoker crossed the road? Because the caner ward for on the other side.
17. What do smoking and Hitler have in common? They both kill a lot of people, but fundamental supporters deny it.

Politicly incorrect:
Religious people:
When I meet a religious person I don't think that are stupid or believe in 2000 year old fairytale with more plot holes than LOST ending. When they tell me about how 7day mess helps them I don't think how they effectively and financially support unwanted children in Africa are born just to die from hunger because catholic church condemns condoms. I don't think about the awful intellectual and actual rape that happens in catholic schools where science is bastardized to fit bible so far it's like first Spiderman movie. I think about how this helps this person to feel better about himself. Like a retarded child who I love and pity to much to hurt even despite the terrible things they are doing to world.

Though sometimes I want to hurt them real bad, strip their nonsense piece by piece till nothing but naked rationality is left.

You know what they say:
You can't build a server room without messing up the cabling.
If it ain't broke don't sell it to the jews.
Make love not disgusting gay coitus.
No party like the holocaust party.
It's easier for a camel to get trough eye of a needle than a rich men to get prosecuted.
Money is the root of all pleasure.
Don't hate the game, hate the developer.


Theme: Bar
I am going to bar, this should be fun like prostate exam during crucifixion.
I went down the dark unlighted steps thinking about that it's to late to update my last will. The first thing that hit me was sweet-sour smell alike of that of a week old decomposing body. Reminder me of my first murder.
Bar was half-lit with few old tables and group of big muscled strong men in leather jackets playing pool in the corner and smoking heavily. My prison mates look like bunch of strawmen compering to these urban brute Apollos. I slowly make my way to the bar, trying to look confident, but not to overconfident. These folks can smell fear like married women.
40 year old bartender look at me with eyes so blue and cruel any SS officer would hill his mother to get them and I can't help to think he has.
He smiles like a man who has everything and asks "what you having lad?".
I swallow my saliva and fear and ask for a beer.

Advice.
1. After 100 gigs you feel comfortable on stage.
2. Joke gets funny only after 4-5 times telling it.

Tags:

(Leave a comment)

Previous Day 2014/02/08
[Archive]
Next Day
Powered by Sviesta Ciba